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@maximsthings
I'm always fascinated by the narrative that people fake disabilities for attention. my big question is what attention!? where is all this attention for disabled people coming from because I haven't seen any.
anyone faking "for attention" would pretty quickly give up when they discover that no one cares about disabled people
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“It just means you have to work double as hard as most people!”
Well maybe I don’t WANT to work double as hard as abled people!! Maybe I deserve a BREAK!! Maybe I’ve been working MORE THAN double as hard for MY WHOLE LIFE and it’s led me to immense burnout & caused me to develop several MORE disabilities!! Maybe I should be ACCOMMODATED so I don’t have to KILL MY BODY AND BRAIN over trying to do what abled people can do!! Maybe I DON’T have to work double as hard!! Maybe if there’s the option to let me NOT work double as hard, I should have it, because I’m already working double as hard JUST TO SURVIVE!!
Why do you think disabled people deserve less rest than mentally & physically abled people?
i do find the rules around clothes fascinating because of how made up it all is. we invented the idea of covering our bodies from the elements because we lack fur like other mammals and then made up all these rules around it and now people will unironically tell you "men cant wear skirts its unnatural" girl none of this is natural. we are born naked and made up the rest as we went along. hope this helps.
everybody: you’ve got to advocate for yourself in medical settings!
medical professionals when a patient advocates for themselves in a medical setting (x100 if that patient is a part of any minority): damn. you’re a hypochondriac crazy bitch who has every mental illness and is seeking every narcotic in existence. that’s the only reason you’d be disappointed in the care you’re receiving here. in retaliation, we will be even less helpful and less sympathetic. our jobs are hard. people are dying. we don’t have time to deal with anyone who is slightly inconvenient for us.
autistic canon event: having the people closest to you say you never think about other people when you prioritize your own needs for once after spending your entire life making yourself small for them
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Unofficial Autism Post
“The brains of people with ADHD tend to have an out of sight out of mind way of working which is why they often forget things but also why they can have difficulty maintaining friendships because they tend to not miss people who aren’t physically present and therefore aren’t as inclined to contact their friends to arrange meetings even if they truly love their friends”
First off, this was probably the single biggest “I do that because of my ADD!?!!?” moment I’ve had since my diagnosis, but also, could my diagnosis please stop giving me excuses for being a bad friend? I need to be held accountable.
I joke. This actually work out very well with my more introverted friends who really like that they don’t have to feel bad for going no contact for weeks at a time. They know I’m not sad about it yet happy to spend time with them when they’re ready.
But also yes, it’s not great for people who want or even need others to show an active interest in the relationship by contacting them first. I’m not good at those kinds of friendships unfortunately but I do my best to show those who don’t mind my less savory ADD tendencies that I am truly happy to be around them when we meet.
OCD things that you don't hear about:
episodes of paranoia, delusions, and dissociation
cyclical thoughts/spirals
magical thinking
episodes that can be very similar to psychosis or mania
attributing human emotions to inanimate objects
dermatillomania and trichotillomania
false sensations (like bugs crawling on skin)
paying way too much attention to very small things
physical health issues caused by compulsions
symptoms that are "problematic" (doing things that are considered "wasteful", needing reassurance or validation from others...)
extreme, deep, dreadful fear of things that can't truly be explained
disconnect between emotional and cognitive/logical responses or thoughts
contamination fears
problems with addiction and dopamine regulation
other people trying to force exposure therapy onto you without your consent and it making your anxiety way worse
list making
STAY SAFE!! [ID: the Gilbert Baker pride flag with the words “Happy pride to all those who are unable to celebrate openly and safely. You are loved and seen!” in all-caps black text over it. /end ID]
i’ve warmed up significantly towards the concept of small talk ever since i learned that its sole purpose is to make friendly noises.
as long as you smile and nod, people are satisfied. it’s just to show that you are nice and there with good intentions. we’re small in a big world and have to rely on other people to be decent to us. so we do our little human dance to each other to say, “i’m not here to hurt you. here’s something we have in common, like the weather or sports or itchy sweaters, so we both know we’re on the same team. we both agree on a basic fact, like that it is rainy or that being itchy is uncomfortable, and this proves we can get along. i’m being light-hearted and non-threatening right now.”
small talk isn’t to get to know a person. it’s just a greeting to affirm you’re buddies in the universe.
i am motivated by wanting the other person to know i am friendly, so i have gotten pretty decent at small talk when i used to hate it.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
i’ve warmed up significantly towards the concept of small talk ever since i learned that its sole purpose is to make friendly noises.
as long as you smile and nod, people are satisfied. it’s just to show that you are nice and there with good intentions. we’re small in a big world and have to rely on other people to be decent to us. so we do our little human dance to each other to say, “i’m not here to hurt you. here’s something we have in common, like the weather or sports or itchy sweaters, so we both know we’re on the same team. we both agree on a basic fact, like that it is rainy or that being itchy is uncomfortable, and this proves we can get along. i’m being light-hearted and non-threatening right now.”
small talk isn’t to get to know a person. it’s just a greeting to affirm you’re buddies in the universe.
i am motivated by wanting the other person to know i am friendly, so i have gotten pretty decent at small talk when i used to hate it.
"well everyone has trauma" correct and yet
you fail to recognize not everyone has trauma that impacts their ability to perform activities of daily living - even right down to basic things like eating. and not everyone has trauma dominate their entire life, with no escape: not even escape from within their own mind.
we can recognize that we live in a society that has doled out trauma to most people without punching down on the most vulnerable by telling them they should be able to do x, y, z (ex: work, make friends, get sober, have hobbies, cook, etc) "like everyone else."
you are not the standard. no one is the standard. we are all unique people in our own right and society has failed us all. we gain nothing by shaming anyone.
it's so wild when your parent changes when you become an adult. my dad is very cordial and non confrontational - he regularly helps me with adult stuff like changing the oil or providing insurance tips. he's always smiling when i call him on video and providing jokes when i complain about college
when i was a kid, i would have to tiptoe around his anger issues often, sometimes running quietly past his work table until he got his own place completely separate from our family, locked away for days. every so often he would start screaming in the car and trying to hit me or my brother for talking too loud while my mom attempted to calm him down as he swerved on the road. and now he, smiling, helps me with car insurance.
like oh, this is just who you are when you have power over someone, and this is who you are when you dont have power over someone. no wonder you can have a normal life, friends, work while scaring the shit out of your kids and wife. i see it now. i see why no one would have believed me. that, i think, is one of the core fears of trauma - seeing the outside of it from the perspective of other adults that brushed you aside, and understanding. of course, that understanding gives the opposite of solace; it just gives you more grief with nowhere for it to go
Not a lot of people talk about the rage and helplessness that comes from losing your childhood to being in flight or fight, only to then go on to develop chronic illness in adulthood. It feels like there’s no escape from what you went through, even when you want to move on your body just can’t.
Sometimes processing trauma looks like making mini comics about dogs.
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cooking with trauma
weird how abled people don't want you to have supports because it may Annoy Them. no, you can't have a shower chair, it'll get in my way. no, you can't put subtitles on, im here to watch a movie not read. because the needs of the disabled are somehow lesser than the wants of the abled.
