Red Lettered Edition

Once Krishnakishore asked me, 'Why have you cast off the sacred thread?'. In those days of God-Vision I felt as if I were passing through the great storm of Aswin and everything had blown away from me. No trace of my old-self was left. I lost all consciousness of the world. I would hardly keep my cloth on my body, not to speak of the sacred thread! I said to Krishnakishore, 'Ah, you will understand if you happen to be as intoxicated with God as I was.'

Master Said: After I had experienced samadhi, my mind craved intensely to hear only about God. I would always search for places where they were reciting or explaining the sacred books, such as Bhagavata, the Mahabharata, and the Adhyatma Ramayana. I used to go to Krishnakishore to hear him read Adhyatama Ramayana.

Shakti alone the root of the Universe. That primal energy has two aspects; vidya and avidya. Avidya deludes. Avidya conjures up, 'woman and gold', which casts the spell. Vidya begets devotion, kindness, wisdom and love, which leads one to God. This avidya must be propitiated, and that is the purpose of the rites of Sakti workship.

The devotee assumes various attitude toward Sakti in order to propitiate Her; the attitude of the handmaid, a 'hero', or a child. A hero's attitude is to please Her even as a man pleases a woman through intercourse.

The worship of the Sakti is extremely difficult. It is no joke. I passed two year as a handmaid and companion of the Divine Mother. But my natural attitude has always been that of a child toward his mother. I regard the breast of any woman as those of my own mother.

Women are, all of them, the veritable images of Sakti. In the Northwest India the bride holds a knife in her hand at the time of marriage; in Bengal, a nut-cutter. The meaning is the bridegroom with the help of bride, who is the embodiment of the Divine power, will sever the bondage of illusion. This is the 'heroic' attitude. I never worship the Divine Mother that way. My attitude toward Her is that of a child toward its Mother.

The bride is the very embodiment of Sakti. Haven't you noticed at the marriage ceremony, how groom sits behind like an idiot ? But the bride- she is so Bold!.

It is his will that we should run about a little. Then it is great fun. God has created the world in play, as it were. This is called Mahamaya, the Great Illusion. Therefore one must take refuge in Divine Mother, the cosmic power itself. It is she who has bound us with the shackles of illusion. The realization of God is possible only when those shackles re severed.

M: "Yes, sir, I realize that. It isn't like thinking of an unreal object. How can a man lose his intelligence if he always fixes his mind on Him whose very nature is eternal Intelligence?

Master: It is through God's grace that you understood that. The doubt of the mind will not disappear without His grace. Doubts do not disappear without self realization.

God cannot be seen with these physical eyes. In the course of spiritual discipline one gets a 'love body', endowed with 'love eyes', 'love ear', and so on. One see God with those love eyes. One hears the sound of God with those 'love ears'. One even gets a sexual organ made of love.

'With this love body' the sould communes with God.

But this is not possible without intense love of God. One sees nothing but God everywhere when he loves him with the great intensity. It is like a person with jaundice, who sees everything in yellow. Then one feels, 'I am verily He'.

'A drunkard, deeply intoxicated, says, "Verily I am Kali!". The gopis, intoxicated with love, exclaimed, "Verily I am Krishna".

One who thinks of God day and night, behold him everywhere. It is like a man seeing flames on all sides after he has gazed fixedly at one flame for some time.

In order to realize God, one must assume one of these attitude : santa, dasya, sakhya, vatsalya, or madhur.

Santa, the serene attitude. The rishi in the olden time had this attitude toward God. They did not desire any worldly enjoyment. It is like the single minded devotion of wife to her husband. She knows that her husband is the embodiment of beauty and love, a veritable madan.

Dasya, the attitude of the servant toward the master. Hanuman had this attitude toward Rama. He felt the strength of a lion when he worked for Rama. A wife feel this mood also. She served her husband with all her heart and soul. A mother also has a little of this attitude, as Yashoda had for Krishna.

Sakhya, the attitude of friendship. Friends say to one another. 'Come here and sit near me'. Sridama and other friends sometime fed Krishna with fruits, part of which they had already eaten, and sometime climbed on his shoulders.

Vatsalya, the attitude of a mother toward her child. This is Yasoda's attitude toward Krishna. The wife,  too, has a little of this. She feeds her husband with her very life-blood, as it were. The mother feels happy only when child has eaten to his heart's content. Yasoda will roam around with butter in her hand, in order to feed Krishna.

According to Vaishnavas the aspirant and the seers of God may be divided into different groups. These are the pravartaka, the sadhaka, the siddha and the siddha of the siddha. He who has just set foot on the path may be called a pravartaka. He may be called sadhaka who has for some time been practicing spiritual disciplines, such as worship, japa, meditation and the chanting of God's name and glories. He may be called a siddha, who has know from his inner experience that God exists. 

An analogy is given in Vedanta to explain this. The master of the house is asleep in the dark room. Someone is groping in the darkness to find him. He touches the couch and says, "No, it is not he". He touches the window and says, "No, it is not he". This is known in Vedanta as the process of "Neti, Neti", 'Not this, Not this'. At last his hands touches the master's body and he exclaims, 'Here he is!'. In other words he is now conscious of the 'existence' of the master. He has found him, but he doesn't yet know him intimately.

"The blossom drops off when the fruit appears. One doesn't have to do one's duty after the attainment of God, nor does one feel like doing it then."

"If  a drunkard takes too much liquor he cannot retain consciousness. If he takes only two or three glasses, he can go on with his work. As you advance nearer and nearer to God, He will reduce your activities little by little, Have no fear."

Perform your duties in an unselfish spirit. The work should always be perform without desiring any result.

"Have you ever seen the spring trap for fish called the  'Satka-kal' ?

They use it in our part of country. One end of a bamboo pole is fastened in the ground, and the other is bent over the catch. From the end a line with a hook hangs over the water, with the bait tied to the hook. When the fish swallows the bait, suddenly the bamboo jumps up ans regains the upright position.

"Again take a pair of scales. for example. If a weight is placed on one side, the lower needle moves away from the upper one. The lower needle is the mind, and the upper one, God. The meeting of the two is yoga/"

Unless the mind becomes steady there cannot be yoga. It is the wind of worldliness that always disturbs the mind, which may be likened to a candle -flame. If that flame does not move at all, then one is said to have attained yoga.

I should like to visit Ishwar Chandra Vidyasagar a few times more. The painter first draws the general outlines and then puts in the details and colors at his leisure. The molder first make image out of clay, then plasters it, then gives it a coat of whitewash, and last of all paints it with a brush. All these steps must be taken successively. Vidyasagar is fully ready, but his inner stuff is covered with a thin layer. He is now engaged in doing good work, but he doesn't know what within himself. God is hidden within him. God dwells with in us. If one knows that, one feels like giving up all activities and praying to God with an yearning soul.

M: "Is it necessary to practice discipline all through life ?"

Master: "No, But one must be up and doing in the beginning. After that one need not work that hard. The helmsman stands up and clutches the rudder firmly as long as the boat is passing through the waves, storms, high wind, or around the curves of the river; but he relaxes after steering through them. As soon as the boat passes the curves and the helmsman feels a favourable wind, he sits comfertably and just touches the rudder. Next he prepares to unflur the sail and gets ready for a smoke. Likewise the aspirant enjoys peace and calm after passing the waves and storms of 'woman and gold'.