#belonging

People would like learning more if it wasn't excluding

People would like socializing more if it wasn't excluding

Little something I worked on. Hope you enjoy.

Whenever people ask, "What is your favourite season?”

I search for an answer that fits like a shoe

but every pair I try on leaves a blister.

Summer is a fever I’m forced to sweat out alone.

I slouch at the end of my bed, 

watching blue-lit Screens of Salt-Skin and laughter, 

of Strangers jumping into a sea I cannot reach. 

I am Sun drenched and Shivering,

Yearning for the same feeling they feel when they zip up

sundresses and blend their makeup.

Autumn is a harvest of "no's".

The air turns sweet and crisp,

but I am "too old" to knock on doors for Sweets, so I stay home,

picking at the wrapper of a Chocolate bar, 

I bought for myself

I Stay behind the glass windows and wooden doors while the leaves blow away

I check my phone.

Nothing. Not a text, a call, a notification.

Winter is a White Silence, 

bare and barren.

I am tucked away in the warmth,

yet the frost seems to grow from the inside out. 

It's the kind of cold that makes you forget what it's like to have someone's hand to hold.

Spring Should be a blooming,

but it's just the grey weight of the "not yet".

unpredictable rains.

And that constant pressure of the exams that my teachers say are "Just around the corner"

So I'm hunched over a desk,

revising for a future I'm not even sure I'm invited to.

The Flowers open, 

but I remain closed.

Even when I am in the house that I Spend all of my time in,

surrounded by the people who carry my name, 

and a thousand "Friends" in the palm of my hand.

I am a ghost in my own hallway

I am just another person that liked a video.

I wear the seasons like a costume that is too tight. 

Uncomfortable.

Awkward.

I am looking for a season that doesn't feel tight, but one that fits just right.

That Feels like my own skin.

I am looking for a place where the air finally lets me in. Thank you for reading!