Nah

you're not allowed to bring wireless devices into classified areas and a security guy noticed a square phone-ish shape in my pocket so he asked me to show him what it was and i had to show him my can of pocket herring :/

i am banned from eating my herring inside. they make me eat it on the smoking area by the loading dock, under the theory that it already smells bad there. but it was raining today which was preventing my breakfast, so i was feeling sad and hungry and then i realized that there was a large cardboard box in the dumpster from a previous delivery. like a fridge sized box. so i fished it out of the dumpster, then tipped it on its side and had a nice little cardboard cave to watch the rain and eat my fish in. which was a great experience. very soothing. very zen. at least until the security guard from the day before stepped outside to smoke. then i tried hiding from him by crawling deeper in the box, which unfortunately did not work. instead he saw a sort of damp sniveling pale hairless creature eating fish in a box, and delivered the verbal killshot of "good morning, mr. smeagol." which is how my day was ruined before 8 am.

"THIS ISN'T A SEX THING" I exasperatedly yell as my leitmotif and that of my mortal enemy are arranged and mixed to play as a single track during our final climatic duel.

"ON MY MOTHER'S NAME, THIS ISN'T A SEX THING" I desperately howl as my nemesis and I pull off a seamless, perfectly coordinated team attack on a greater threat, with no prior training or practice, our skills and habits mingling and mixing perfectly and naturally due to our dozens of duels with each other, leading to immensely intimate familiarity with each other's martial habits, combat tendencies, and overall skillset.

12ga Recursionshot

Have you seen the new movie? It's on library. It's literally on the library. It's on library without ads. It's literally on your local public library. You can probably ask for it on your library. Dude it's on your library. It's in the original case too. It's on library. You can watch it at the library. You can go to your local library and watch it. Register onto your local library right now. Go to your library. Dive into your library. You can watch it. It's on there. Your library has it for you. Your library has it for you.

oh my GOSH wow... I'm on Library...

man we gotta get regular porn back on this website

not the. not the right image

i dont think this is a post that needs reblogging actually. if you ask me