i am a shieldmaiden and my hand is ungentle

Bro I implore you?!? I fucking beseech thee?!?!!?

what a privilege it is to come home to a little animal that loves you like you're their whole world.

hey guys is it gay for a girl to vow to be your knight and protect you from all harm and invite you over to her house to make you pasta and let you nap in her bed or is that like,,, just bros being bros?

@wheezecheese

This has gone beyond "I cannot explain this to my spouse" and is firmly in "Archaeologists of the future will decide this is the point at which a group of people diverged from mainstream humanity and developed a new, indecipherable form of communication."

crazy how quickly dust accumulates. i should be allowed to put my trinkets on a shelf and not touch them and they remain in perfect condition forever. dont even get me STARTED on the inside of a computer. why do i have to brush your teeth. youre technology.

we come from the earth and some day return to her and usually she is patient but in some places she gets hungry and those places are called caves and that’s why you should never go in caves because caves are where the earth wants to eat you

this was intended to convince you not to go caving but some of you seem to think more with your crotch than your head god bless

i NEED to sit by the SEA and FORGET that i’m ALIVE

alternatively: i NEED to sit by the SEA and REMEMBER that i’m ALIVE

the world is beautiful because my friends have ocs

we used to curse whole bloodlines for less than this

the purpose of friends is to have people who unconditionally hate your shitty exes & relatives. like maybe YOU have a complex relationship with your father but i sure don't. i'm outside his house with a gun. he's not the unforgivable asshole who raised me he's just an unforgivable asshole

sits on my own blog like it’s the edge of a lake wistfully

skips a stone over a few posts

"You're losing blood" no I know exactly where it is. The floor. Don't ever underestimate me.

ughhh fine *experiences emotional growth*

We need etsy to get bought by someone who will run it like the navy i need to only see small businesses in eastern europe weaving baskets by hand and anime yaoi keychains with original fanart

Literally need someone with an serial killer level obsession with content moderation to sit at a wall of monitors sniping dropshippers. I need etsy HQ to look and sound like the nerv command center in Evangelion

joke i'll never get tired of: "they died doing what they loved, [something no one would ever do on purpose]"

they died doing what they loved, getting stabbed in the chest 5 to 7 times.