Sunny Disposish

One book into the Liveship Traders trilogy and I realise I could never support an adaptation purely because Kennit would send the internet into a shambles. The man was grown in a lab to do numbers on tumblr.com. First time you meet him you’re told he has blue eyes and mommy issues. He’s a pretty boy, a germaphobe, and the most ruthless man to ever live. He’s going to make himself pirate king whether they want him or not with a bit of luck, a magical charm, and a prophecy he wrote himself. Moral ambiguity? There’s no ambiguity. He does not show a single redeeming quality in an 800+ page book. He hates women, he’s ambivalent to slavery, he thinks empathy makes you an idiot. And yet he’s worshipped like a god wherever he goes, propelled forward into successes he desperately craved but had almost no hand in achieving. There is a slice of the internet that would foam at the mouth over this man and they would have our dashboards in a strange hold. Pirate Patrick Bateman can never take corporeal form. This website would never recover.

robin hobb talking about how the fool was only supposed to show up for one scene, say a single line and disappear, but when she started to write he refused to leave….he wanted to stay…….‘when he suddenly declares, ‘we’re here to save the world, you and i’ i’m going i have no idea what you’re talking about’…….‘he’s one of those characters that has no respect for an outline, no respect for the plot’…….if i think at all about beloved fighting tooth and nail scratching and biting to stay, to stay by fitz, to not be left behind, in and out of the story i break my own heart in a million little pieces. my curiosity has always been greater than my wisdom. but largest of all is my own loneliness………

fitz is thee unreliable narrator ever he’s so fucking funny like his logic clearly makes perfect sense to him bc he is Very Intelligent Very Well Trained and sometimes he’ll make an observation that’s almost normal and you get baited into thinking omg he’s making a genuine self-actualising realisation and then he follows it up with the most batshit irrational repressed self-hating sentence you’ve ever read. this repeats for 9 books and the whole time you’re thinking Stupid Idiot Please Learn Surely You Cannot Go On Like This while fitz is like this is my unbiased factual autobiography and now you understand why i am awful. you must also have witnessed how normal and platonic i am about my close male friend the fool