operational status: 63%

i don’t get hyped for games anymore i just watch an announcement trailer and think “huh neat” then forget about the game until i see a youtube vid about it 2 years later with WHAT WENT WRONG?😱 overlaid on the thumbnail

fathers casually dropping the craziest lore of their lives in the middle of a conversation

When my great grandpa was on his deathbed my grandpa (his son) was with him and says his last words were “I told them they shouldn’t have hanged that woman. Well by damn they’re paying now” and no one in my family knows what the fuck that means

she allegoried on my cave til i [JOKE PENDING]

Came up to me the other day, the middle of his pants totally soaked, and said “mama, I’m having a situation called ‘I peed in my pants.’”

I don’t think I even told you guys about the six months he spent saying “fuck” instead of “truck.”

All this, and also, they can tell you lots about their favorite things. My 2 year old nephew can tell you all about Star Wars (the 8 movies he’s seen at least) and loves going out of his way to bring up how Anakin was good and bad and good again when he died. Trust me, little kids learn and mimic and reenact all the things they get attached to. Also, he named his first fish Jengo Fett, and all following fish Boba Fett, so juries still out on how much he understands clones.

Kids pick up the language that’s used around and to them. Mannerisms too. They are tiny, efficient mimics and it will come out at the WEIRDEST times. Young kids will ABSOLUTELY say all the stuff listed here.

My family’s lore includes the time my mother offhandedly said to Cousin’s son–who was maybe five–that Cousin’s wife certainly did have strong opinions about some minor thing, and the kid let out a sigh and said, in the driest and flattest and most world-weary tone you’ve ever heard, “Tell me about it.”

once i was helping with a class of 3 year olds and during drawing time one girl asked for a lion, specifically a lioness. i drew it and she just looked in silence so thinking she wanted a more liony lion i was like “do you want me to draw a boy lion next?” and she gives me this 🤨ass affronted look and says “umm she doesn’t NEED a man.”

This post is ancient and stupid but I still laugh whenever I see it

This is satisfying to me.

They’re free

Yes, but at what cost?

16 cents.

i love it so much every time i see it

“ugh stupid gravity” 

IM FUXKING CSHAKING

I haven’t seen this post on my dash in *years* bless this

Bless, this is absolutely amazing

I love this. It’s so gestural and he’s so exasperated about gravity.

The perfect comedic timing of the NASA logo.

it’s dangerous to go alone! take this. *kisses you straight on the lips*