Welcome to this secondary blog that will essentially be a place to post shenanigans with mutuals and other funny (or not) things I find on Tumblr. Basically, for social things, and after careful consideration things related to writing (because at the end of the day, I’m a writer).
If you are interested, this is my primary blog @luluthespectator, where you will find hero/villain stories (mostly), a few HASO (Humans Are Space Orcs) stories and original characters of Void and Light.
If you’re one of my mutuals, I might take a few business days before answering you because I want to make a good answer to your posts.
Main master list
(because apparently I can’t not make one)
Shenanigans with mutuals
Serious stuff/Signal boost
Quick link: Compiling a few posts in case Tumblr wants to lay a finger on the reblogs again
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Chat Control 1.0 may have passed, again. Now Meta and Google can scan our private messages until April 2028.
But, not all hope is lost.
I have seen the way the deputies slowly but surely changed their positions on the matter. If Chat Control wasn't passed as a second reading, it would have been rejected.
This is why we must keep making noise. We must keep signing petitions and sending messages to our representatives. Because it works, because their position shifts with every action we take.
NON à la mise sur écoute de votre téléphone avec Chat Control
We can keep fighting against worse measures.
Learn about the EU Chat Control proposal and contact your representatives to protect digital privacy and encryption.
In the meantime:
You can go from messaging apps like WhatsApp to once that encrypts your private conversations like Signal or Threema.
2. You can start looking for a good VPN to protect yourself on the Internet. Proton VPN comes with the free email address.
3. You can change your mail from Google to Proton, Tutamail, Infomaniak and surely more...
I don't know how many people do this with me. I don't know where they are nor who they are but I know for a fact I'm not the only one. You're not the only one either.
You can still take action now by sending a pre-written message to your European representative to oppose Chat Control, to not let your messages, photos and communications with your friends get scanned.
Learn about the EU Chat Control proposal and contact your representatives to protect digital privacy and encryption.
My blog will never be free from politics, if you are in the UK, wake the fuck up.
When people say "America sneezes, and the UK catches a cold" they. Are. Not. Joking.
The UK has nineteen ICE teams.
Labour is pushing immigration policy to try and secure voters from the far right, because Reform is rising in the polls.
9 million people in the UK are at risk of deportation because of policy they're quietly releasing. Reform is promising to deport swathes if they're elected. Conservatives will follow that line too.
"Secure Borders UK" is now an official TikTok account where they brag about deportation numbers. Plans to convert large builds into immigration housing centres to get asylum seekers out of hotels. Buildings not built for humans to live in, but for storage, or livestock. Not. People.
They are demonising ethnic minorities, labelling car washes, nail salons, barber shops as immigrant hot spots, infamously working class occupations. They're going after the minorities, then the poor people, then anyone and everyone else.
Reform, Nigel Farage has vowed to leave the European Convention on Human Rights if he becomes Prime Minister. You learn about the ECHR when you are fourteen, it is part of your Citizenship GCSE, because it is a vital foundation of our human rights. Without it, there is nothing stopping us from losing all humanity, all liberty, all basic human decency, and humane treatment.
The Digital ID Kier Starmer keeps pushing is only the next step in the surveillance state the technically illiterate politicians keep pushing, and it is dangerous for a multitude of reasons, but at it's core is that they do not understand technology, yet are integrating it at speeds that will devastate our country. It's kept quiet, but you can find evidence of several data leaks, hacks, and releases just in the past few months.
Kemi Badenoch is a puppet for the Conservatives. They do not care that she is a Black woman beyond gaining favor from Black voters. None of the ethnic minority politicians are going to save you, they are defecting to Reform or actively campaigning for laws that will oppress you.
We are rapidly mirroring America's political climate. This next election is not between Labour and the Conservatives, the Liberal Democrats and UKIP don't stand a chance. Tactical voting has been employed for decades now, playing between Labour and Conservatives. Now it is between the Green Party, and Reform. Don't believe the propaganda—the Greens aren't going to tax you, their harsher economic policy is aimed at the billionaires. You don't have to agree with their policies, but it is between environmental conservation, or largescale violation of human rights.
Open your eyes.
If you don't want to be like America, like Minnesota, like Minneapolis, protesting in the streets, hiding your neighbours, watching people be kidnapped in broad daylight irregardless of citizenship, then pull your head out of the sand.
Political apathy, voter apathy is a thing of the past.
You engage now, or you watch it burn down around you.
I am really freaked out about what I’ve heard the poles as of May are saying. Apparently people will be focusing on a top three of conservatives, labour or reform. Some of my concerns with this can be summed up in this video.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=PGGgzSPFCpM&ra=m
Farage has spoken about adding a ‘barren tax’ onto women (and possibly men next, let’s not assume anybody will be safe forever).
He is VERY out of touch with the common worker, and his points and thoughts about them suggest that he msy bring us to a future where employers in the UK have a tighter grip on their employees, shifting the work-life balance in a negative way for said employees.
Then there’s his matter of wanting to privatise healthcare. The NHS is overloaded, but this can be helped by focusing on funding thwir system instead of the pockets of billionaires. Look to the US, people would rather drive to a hospital while injured because of how much an ambulance costs. We are worried enough about the student debt many will be acquiring at the age of 18-19, what happens if you add medical debt on top of that?
So from these policies alone, we can see Farage wants to punish women for not having children bt paying more tax, but when they do have children he wants them to enter medical debt and be unable to work from home where they can take care of their child and not have to find a nursery or babysitter to give even more money to.
Even if you aren’t a woman, imagine getting into an accident and needing medical attention. Instead of just walking out of the hospital with instructions for recovery, you have to deal with this recovery on top of hundreds, if not thousands of pounds owed to the hospital for being treated for your injury.
Yet Reform seems to be leading in the polls. This concerns me greatly, they are not our friends.
The barren tax is wild, it just shows how sinister Reform really is.
It doesn't account for women (like myself) with conditions that stand to effect fertility and child-bearing capabilities. Would he still tax people with cancer-ridden uteruses? With medical hysterectomies?
If those women don't have children then he gets more tax. For those women to have children, they will either need medical intervention (which would cost thousands in a privatised NHS), or to turn to IVF, which is a notoriously expensive avenue.
No matter what, if Farage gets to be PM, anyone with a uterus loses everything a century of feminist activism has earned us, and we're turned back into nothing but broodmares for the party you can find 90% of under Clare's Law.
These men will abuse everyone they can. You are not exempt. Do not vote Reform.
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The European Union is about to vote for “Chat Control 2.0” on Monday and why that is a problem
Privacy empowers. Surveillance weakens.
Chat Control 2.0 will be used to look at all the private conversations of every European citizen with an AI in order to look for child abuse and predatory practices.
The problem is that it destroys privacy and anonymity. The AI used mostly flags innocent content and even the very children it is trying to protect: consensual sextext and pictures of children at the beach.
All those data’s are sent directly to the authorities, your pictures and your texts, if the AI deems something is wrong, can and will be viewed by the police.
This makes it harder for the authorities to keep track of genuine predatorial behaviours while being flooded with falls reports.
And the problem is that, once it is put in place, it isn’t just “predatorial content” that will be able to be flagged. It could be expended to anything, anything the governments don’t want people to talk about.
What you can do:
You can send an email to the European representatives, it is already pre written if you don’t know what to say:
Learn about the EU Chat Control proposal and contact your representatives to protect digital privacy and encryption.
You can tag all the people you know. Tell it to all the people you know. The more noise we make, the more they will have to listen:
I saw this when running newpipe. But wait, it gets deeper. I clicked on the details buttons and it said as of today, we have 83 days left until Google rolls out this new requirement for apps inside and outside of the google play store. If any developer disagrees with their new terms and fees, they will be blocked!
I'll share some of the info below:
Looks like they're trying to nuke the remaining privacy and freedoms we have left on the internet.
What to do?
-Get your developer friends to not comply to their new guides
- Sign the open letter on the site and take action by checking out thwir full resources list on their website as well!
To summarize, this is all daunting especially when you feel all alone with unfair and inhumane regulations comming out faster than improvements but we got this working together!
Share the link with your friends, family and anyone who will listen!
Your phone is about to stop being yours. In September 2026, Google will block every Android app whose developer hasn't registered with them.
tumblr staff will not contact you through anything other than email or their official accounts, which will all have this badge:
DO NOT ENGAGE WITH THIS OR SIMILAR ACCOUNTS AND ABSOLUTELY DO NOT CLICK ANY LINKS FROM IT.
report and block. i'd also appreciate it if you shared this post, bc that blog was JUST created and was already tagging a LOT of people, and i know not everyone has the scam-sensing instinct, even if this might seem obvious to some.
The fact that people could fall for it is pretty telling of the state of the world. Ten years ago everyone would have known this is a scam and not have to think twice.
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For all the people I know and don’t know (especially writers)
Also I advise people to switch from Google docs to something that dowsn’t have AI like Obsidian or Ellipsus (I’m on Ellipsus and it’s amazing and updated regularly)
This is one of the longest warning I've ever made, so I put them more or less in order. Let me know if I've missed some.
Warnings: angst, compliant Leader(=Whumpee), ambiguous villain, doll whump, emotional whump, noncon nudity(not sexual), brief unclear mention of SA (to say it didn't happen), dehumanisation(x2), panic attack
Before Leader opened his eyes, he could feel his body ache. He didn't feel rested and he was fighting to crawl his way into consciousness. His eyelids were heavy, so heavy. Still, the light of a lamp made its way to him, then the outline of a room appeared around him. Wooden walls and purple velvet.
Where was he? It wasn't his room. If it wasn't his room it meant he had been captured. Again.
His stomach folded around a heavy weight. He had been abandoned by Superhero and left to die. He was all on his own.
And it was Villain who captured him. And they liked doing things their way. His heart pulsed erratically in his chest, each breath was more difficult to take than the previous one. Villain wasn't interested by anything the other ones wanted. Last time they had asked for people in exchange of the money they had stolen.
People.
Usually it was the other way around, usually, villains captured people to get ransoms. Villain didn't.
Adrenaline pushed him to sit. His whole body protested, his stomach hurt and his arms felt like they were made of wood. He hissed between his teeth as his hands stung but continued. Why wasn't he tied up? What was going to happen to him?
He was on a bed covered by colourful furry blankets and silken sheets. There were stuffed pillows under his hands. Uncomfortable warmth wrapped around his body. What was going to happen to him?
He needed to flee or negotiate his way out of it. Then he would have to explain himself to Superhero, then he would have to go back to his usual tasks with extra ones for his failure and then… too many things to do. The headache only gripped his head tighter.
Wait!
There were people - no, mannequins - all around the canopy bed. He had just noticed them. He needed to focus. His mind was going haywire again.
Deep breath…
…deep breath…
…one thing at a time.
First, he needed to know whether he could walk on his own. All on his own.
-Ah. Darling! You're awake.
Too late. Fall back. He needed to negotiate his way out of this. He tried to say his standard sentences for the situations where he got kidnapped but he was interrupted by Villain's gasp followed by excited words.
-You're so gorgeous in that light. I will need to keep you just a little longer to take pictures of you.
What?
-There are so many clothes in my collection that I'd like to make you try.
Villain was jumping excitedly, their white fur coat followed their movements as they continued spilling their sentences:
-I've been obsessed with your silhouette ever since I saw you in that admiral outfit on the TV.
Villain ran by his side and took Leader's hand. He didn't have the time to catch up, his brain felt muddled and slow.
-Come with me. We're going to have so much fun together.
Leader's arm was guided a little higher. Pain spread through his strained muscles. Before he could stop it, a small sound left him. It wasn't much, but it was enough to make Villain stop in their tracks.
They observed him with a gaze he didn't know how to decipher. It was halfway through concern and scandalised. Their excited smile was replaced with a frown, a foreboding frown. Their voice had lost its softness, it was scathing, almost.
-What was that Darling?
An invisible hand grasped Leader's throat, halting another whimper. A long foreboding silence settled. He scrambled for something, anything that would save him. He managed to push out:
-Nothing.
Villain took one step closer, touching the edge of the bed. Leader stiffened despite the pain and braced himself for what would happen next. A hit, a shout, a cut, the prick of a needle. Anything.
Instead, Villain lifted his head softly, cupping his cheek in a warm hand. His nape ached, the discomfort in his back soared. Yet, he was paralysed. His very thoughts were stuck in place, afraid to risk showing in his eyes.
Usually, his captors would be violent and brash and loud.
But Villain…they wrapped a warning in a honeyed whisper, caressing his cheek:
-You owe me. I saved your life it is only normal you would act as my little doll for a while.
Leader's world was swaying. Fear ate away at him. Those quiet words were roaring in his mind, repeating themselves, louder and louder. He swallowed, the lump in his throat burnt. He answered in a breath:
-Yes, sir.
Villain nodded. Their frown was still there. This time there was glee in their order.
-Photos are non negotiable now.
Leader didn't want to risk negotiating. Not right away. Not when he didn't know how dangerous Villain could be. How dangerous they truly were. They could be hiding so much behind their fluffy and regal fur coat, beneath their velvet words and their gentle mannerisms.
No one messed with them, only Superhero to an extent. There was a reason for this and it eluded Leader.
He managed to whisper:
-Yes, sir.
A gentle smile graced their lips again yet the atmosphere didn't get any lighter. The pressure on Leader's chest still kept him from breathing.
-Do you think you can stand up? You were almost buried under debris, it must have taken a toll on you.
This wasn't a question. This wasn't even a suggestion. Leader wasn't about to risk it. He gritted his teeth and forced himself up. Everything was burning and stinging. The world was spinning but if he faltered those would be the least of his concerns.
He didn't have his weight on his feet yet but sweat was already soaking his forehead. Still he assured, breathless:
-I can stand up.
He stood on his legs. He could barely see as dark twinkling spots and blinding pulsing stars grew in front of him. Everything in his body was on fire. The room flipped as he dropped backward. His weight was resting on an arm.
His mind gave out.
———
He resurfaced again. Instead of pain, he was met with a numb sensation. Numb sensation…numb…
His breath caught in his throat. His heart was racing again. It meant he had been drugged. What did Villain do when he was out? Oh no… he hadn't done as he was told.
Superhero would…no, Villain would be mad. His stomach felt like it was eating at itself. It tore off a chunk when a hand combed through his hair. His heart jolted, it felt like an electrical shock. A silken voice murmured:
-Darling. I know you are awake.
Leader forced himself to open his burning eyes. His eyelids felt heavy, it would be so easy to close them again. Especially since Villain caressed his head, leaving a trail of warmth behind. The blanket was so soft against his skin.
-Do you think you can get up?
This question startled him. He had failed once. What would happen if he faltered again? His stiffened limbs unfolded. The pain wasn't as bad. He was laying on a velvet sofa.
-Careful, I wouldn't want you to pass out again. I have so much to do with you.
Why didn't they want to do those things while he was unconscious? Did they want a stronger reaction? He hauled himself on his feet, the floor was cold, he was surprised to see the room he was in clearly. There were dressed and naked mannequins along the walls and a table with papers and fabrics on them.
Villain wrapped around his arm, taking on some of his weight and giving him some warmth as the coldness of the room bit his skin. Leader realised he was naked and vulnerable, more than what he already was. He didn't think Villain took advantage of him, not this way at least, he would have felt different. He still tried to protect some of his dignity behind his hand.
A satisfied hum filled his ear as he was moved on a podium and left there, in front of a mirror. His legs were sore but it wasn't unbearable. Did he just have painkillers? His eyes roamed over his scarred and bruised body, stopping on each purple spots and dark red marks. He met his own terrified gaze.
-Darling, what's your favourite colour?
There was fearful confusion in his eyes. He hesitated before turning towards Villain. They looked too happy. Not answering felt like a big mistake.
-I…
He didn't have a favourite colour. He had never thought about something like this. He weakly blurted out the first colour that came in mind:
-I-blue…I like blue.
-But is it your favourite colour?
His heartbeat spiked he answered maybe a little too fast, maybe a little too uncertain:
-Yes, sir.
Villain smiled. He didn't like that smile at all. They crooned:
-Perfect, my little Darling.
"Their little Darling". Was that what Leader would become? In a flash he remembered the words Villain had used earlier "my little doll".
He forced himself to breathe correctly. He needed to leave, he needed to find a way out and quickly. Before Villain could do irreparable damage. He also needed to bide his time, at least to be able to walk on his own.
Either way he was trapped, completely and utterly. No one would come for him. He dreaded what he would have to do to stay alive, to save himself. It wouldn't be the first time he would have to abandon his morals…but it was always so painful. Can he even save himself with Villain?
Villain had stopped moving beside him. He looked at them as his heart grew a little louder. Their smile was bright and their eyes were proud as they pointed a piece of clothing with their hands.
A dress?
-Wouldn't you look pretty in this? Pretty like a little doll.
It was a white and blue dress, with floral lace at the top and blue and white frou-frou for the bottom. Would he…have to wear that?
-Turn around, Darling.
He did as he was told and observed Villain's reflection in the mirror carefully. He didn't want to be touched by them. He whispered:
-I can put it on, if you'd like.
-No, you don't get to move unless I say so. I want to have the honour to dress you.
Was it an honour or was it a way to humiliate him? He didn't dare say another word after this. He stayed pliant as Villain moved him around and…dressed…him. Each touch from Villain was uncomfortably warm, disturbing in its proximity.
He didn't see the point in fighting. The debris maybe didn't crush him, yet he still felt broken.
-You look like a flower, an ivory and blue rose.
He nodded. Maybe, he did look like a flower. So utterly vulnerable and frail. No one would come for him. Maybe, like a flower, he was stuck in place. He didn't have the strength to escape this time. Maybe he didn't want to fight and he didn't want to be hurt anymore.
Villain had put his arms up to make adjustments to the dress. His arms were trembling and burning, the pain was too much. He hid his eyes beneath his hands and murmured, scared and soft, breaking all the way.
-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I can't hold this position anymore.
He didn't want to see. He didn't want to face Villain's cold fury and their frown. All he got was a hand rubbing his forearm. It was that much more scary, what was the procedure for this?
-Little Darling. Don't worry, dolls aren't supposed to be able to keep their arms up aren't they?
Tears were escaping him.
-I don't think so.
-Will you stay nice and gentle for me?
He begged:
-Yes I will. Yes, I will. Please, I will.
Villain took his hands in theirs. Leader kept his head low and his eyes shut. They could see everything, he knew it. His small sobs were shaking his shoulders. Villain cradled his cheeks, wiping the tears away. They shushed him:
-Good. Stop crying, dolls don't cry, do they?
-They don't.
He took a breath and tried to keep the tears at bay. They only came back with more force, tearing a sob from him. He hid his trembling lips behind his shaking hand. Why couldn't he do as he was told?
He kept repeating:
-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
Everything else happened in a blur of panic. Villain got him to sit down. He shielded himself with his arms. His whole body was shaking, his whole body was burning up and aching.
What would happen to him?
He was messing everything up. Villain would be mad. What did they do to people who were in their way? Were they going to lobotomize him? To brainwash him? To break his spine so he wouldn't go away?
He curled even more on himself, hiding his face once again. He was too young for all of this, he wished he would have lived happily with parents and friends. His ragged breath barely kept enough air in his lungs.
He had something soft and fluffy in his hands. He hid himself beneath it. It was useless but he needed it, he needed to feel protected. In the darkness and the warmth some of his senses came back to him.
He managed to reign his racing thoughts first. He had a procedure for this.
First, deep breath…
…deep breath…
…he could always negotiate something.
It would be unpleasant but he could. He wiped away the warm wet trails on his cheeks and brought his breath back under control. There was only the pounding of his heart, beating frantically in his whole body, the soreness and the exhaustion.
After another deep breath, he took the blanket off of his head. The dim lights allowed his eyes to go directly towards Villain. They had only a black slim tank top, and yet, they managed to look majestic.
-Darling, you must be exhausted.
His head went to the blanket in his arms. It was Villain's fur coat.
-My apologies.
He tried to give Villain's coat back but his arms protested. Villain themselves brought his arms lower.
-None of this. You need to go to sleep.
What did they mean? Was he going to get sedated? He was lifted up in bridal carry. Villain had sculpted muscles under their white regal coat. Leader was almost relieved not to have to walk on his own legs.
He was installed on the vintage sofa and Villain laid him down, like they would do with…a doll. His legs were supported by the cushions. What would happen?
-Now, my little Darling, you sleep.
-Here?
-Where else?
He didn't respond to that. He only nodded. What else could he do but follow Villain's orders? Especially after what happened. He closed his eyes and did his best not to move. He didn't want to know what would happen if he were to do so of his own accord.
He was too exhausted to disobey either way.
He was relieved when slumber pulled him in its embrace
Ohhhh I loved this!!! It REALLY takes your heart and crushes it to dust though XD (but isn’t that what we whump-lovers are here for? ;P)
Anyways, I needed to comment on this without the character limit of tags so I’m just spilling everything like this (hope that’s okay)
Poor Leader’s really going through it, isn’t he? He’s in pain and alone and has just regained consciousness – but instead of trying to flee right away he’s trying to figure out how to survive. That he was adapting right away, trying to mold himself to his capturer’s wishes almost on instinct really says A lot! He’s obviously got experience already with being manipulated and formed and expected to obey. How nonchalantly he thinks about being captured AGAIN (with fear and a heavy heart of course, but rather like something that just periodically happens, like a dentist’s appointment, that you may hate but still have to endure for you own good) caught me off guard and made me want to shield him from any kind of new pain right away!
~ He needed to flee or negotiate his way out of it. Then he would have to explain himself to Superhero, then he would have to go back to his usual tasks with extra ones for his failure and then…~
Not even the thought of escaping brings any kind of hope or relief it’s just duty, exhaustion, getting scolded, being ‚not enough‘ again and again and again...
I’m not gonna lie, the mannequins were creepy – even more so when I realized that they are what Leader is supposed to be now for villain: pretty, docile little dolls that Villain can dress and pose and play with however he likes. (By the way if Villain asked for people before… then where are they?? Did they send them home after a while? Are they still there? Are they DEAD??)
The ‚deep breath‘ mantra makes it seem like Leader has absolutely worked through one to many stressful situation and/or panic attack before, he seems so… used to it. It’s incredibly sad.
~ He tried to say his standard sentences for the situations where he got kidnapped but he was interrupted...~
His.. his STANDARD SENTENCE?? Oh, you poor sweetheart. How many times were you left behind and then taken and hurt as you had to find your way out all alone? TT
~I will need to keep you just a little longer to take pictures of you.~
What… pictures? What KIND of pictures? What are they for? ‚Art‘? Blackmail? Humiliation? O.o
~ An invisible hand grasped Leader's throat, halting another whimper [...] He scrambled for something, anything that would save him. He […] braced himself for what would happen next. A hit, a shout, a cut, the prick of a needle. Anything. ~
Oh no. Poor thing. Always expecting the worst (probably because in his experience that’s EXACTLY what happens if you show any kind of ‚weakness‘ or disobedience TT)
~... afraid to risk showing in his eyes.~
„Eyes are the window to the soul“, right? So despite everything he’s still trying to protect his soul. That somehow makes me hopeful...
~ You owe me. I saved your life it is only normal you would act as my little doll for a while.~
Nope, Leader doesn’t owe you shit! Leave him alone! (Or rather take care of him, but not like THIS, please TT)
~ Leader's world was swaying. Fear ate away at him. [...] He answered in a breath: Yes, sir.~
Oh. I expected anything but that. Silence, maybe, or defense. But this? Oh, this is bad! (A testement to Leader’s awful mental state, not bad writing of course XD)
~They could be hiding so much behind their fluffy and regal fur coat, beneath their velvet words and their gentle mannerisms.~
No comment from me, just admiration for this very beautiful sentence :3
~This wasn't a question. This wasn't even a suggestion. Leader wasn't about to risk it. He gritted his teeth and forced himself up. ~
But it WAS a question! What kind of environment is Leader used to, to hear a question and immediately see it as an order – one that he has to fulfill no matter what. (Superhero, I hate you -.-)
~ He didn't have his weight on his feet yet but sweat was already soaking his forehead. Still he assured, breathless: I can stand up. ~
Because the punishment for failing would be worse than the current kind of pain and injury and fear, is that it? (Superhero, you’re an abusive asshole!)
I was almost grateful that Leader passed out again :(
~ What did Villain do when he was out? Oh no… he hadn't done as he was told.~
Did I read thatright and he fears the consequences for ‚disobedience‘ MORE than whatever villain could have possibly done to him while he was unconscious??? (Superhero, you’re f*d up!!)
~Superhero would…no, Villain would be mad. ~
THAT SLIP UP! OMG TT Getting stabbed in the chest would have been kinder!
~ His stomach felt like it was eating at itself. It tore off a chunk when a hand combed through his hair. His heart jolted, it felt like an electrical shock.~
When even kindness feels like a punsihment then something is seriously wrong!!! (SUPERHERO, I’M COMING FOR YOU!!!!)
~ Why didn't they want to do those things while he was unconscious? Did they want a stronger reaction?~
Ouch. What a way to think. Can I hug him, please?
~ He didn't think Villain took advantage of him, not this way at least, he would have felt different.~
That’s a statement. Not a question.
How… how does he know that?
~ His eyes roamed over his scarred and bruised body, stopping on each purple spots and dark red marks. He met his own terrified gaze.~
Such a powerful (horrible) picture, being put on a podium and having to look at yourself like that, almost seeing yourself through your captor’s eyes.
~He didn't have a favourite colour. He had never thought about something like this.~
Oh. Oh no. People tend to have favourites of a lot of things, even when they’re young or busy. Unless they don’t get to chose. Unless their voice doesn’t count and someone else decides for them and they don’t get to do anything else but obey and agree and take what they’re given...
~ Before Villain could do irreparable damage. ~
Oh honey, I think superhero has already done plenty of that..
~No one would come for him. He dreaded what he would have to do to stay alive, to save himself. It wouldn't be the first time he would have to abandon his morals…but it was always so painful.~
He’s so sure of it, that no one will even TRY to come save him. Superhero is an asshole (we already established that, plenty XD but what about the others, the rest of the team? Did no one care for him at all? TT
Also reading that part feels like walking across shards of glass and every new phrase like „always“ and „abandon“ and „wouldn't be the first time“ is another bloody cut.
~ He didn't want to be touched by them. He whispered: I can put it on, if you'd like.~
So Leader’s way of trying to maintain boundaries isn’t to say ‚No‘ or to tell someone he doesn’t want to; it’s doing the thing he doesn’t want to happen to him by himself to try and keep at least a miniscule amount of pretend-control… That’s great. Not devastating at all :) *lies*
~He didn't see the point in fighting. The debris maybe didn't crush him, yet he still felt broken~
TT
~You look like a flower, an ivory and blue rose.
He nodded. Maybe, he did look like a flower. So utterly vulnerable and frail. No one would come for him. Maybe, like a flower, he was stuck in place. He didn't have the strength to escape this time. Maybe he didn't want to fight and he didn't want to be hurt anymore.~
Someone (okay, his KIDNAPPER, but I’m making a point here) is telling him he looks like a flower, and instead of ‚beautiful‘ or ‚pretty‘ or ‚worth admiring‘ leader hears ‚fragile‘, and ‚unprotected‘, and ‚easy to crush‘. Okay. I’m fine. It’s totally fine :)
~He hid his eyes beneath his hands and murmured, scared and soft, breaking all the way. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I can't hold this position anymore. ~
Still trying to hide away, I see :(((
~All he got was a hand rubbing his forearm. It was that much more scary, what was the procedure for this?~
Darling, there is no ‚procedure‘, you’re a HUMAN BEING with FEELINGS and FEARS and… someone needs to drop superhero into a bucket of icewater -.-
~ Good. Stop crying, dolls don't cry, do they?~
Dolls also don’t beg, but you just mADE HIM!
~He hid his trembling lips behind his shaking hand. Why couldn't he do as he was told?~
Because you’re NOT A DOLL! And you don’t deserve any of this!!!
~ Were they going to lobotomize him? To brainwash him? To break his spine so he wouldn't go away?~
He’s so.. methodical in his way of thinking about all the awful things that could be done to him, still effective and logical, even inmidst a complete breakdown. He could have been a force to be reckoned with when nurtured, but instead Superhero chose to tear him down.
~He had a procedure for this. First, deep breath……deep breath……he could always negotiate something.
It would be unpleasant but he could. ~
Of course. A procedure. A bargain. Even if it means suffering and ‚abandoning his morals‘, all for the greater good, to get back to superhero (and then be used all over again.)
Also I’m kinda touched that villain gave him the coat – but I still don’t like them. They’re too fixated on their own pleasure, of getting some ‚pretty doll‘ to play with. Maybe (hopefully?) they’ll get to see the person behind their ‚toy‘ and take better care of Leader soon.)
~His head went to the blanket in his arms. It was Villain's fur coat. -My apologies.~
Apologizing for recieveing comfort that was willingly given. How very on point for Leader.
Now, that kinda got longer than I thought, but I have so many feelings about this (excuse the yelling and Superhero-threatening, please XD)
Also I somehow just now saw that there is also a ‚good‘ (or not so good) version already where villain shows leader actual kindness? I’ll go read that now!
Thank you for writing and sharing (and tagging me!!!)
Wow. This was such a thorough explanation of this story. I took a little while to respond because: wow. You don’t know how many cartwheels my writer heart did in my chest and how many times I’ve reread your repost (I learn new things every time I reread it by the way).
You described things I didn’t even realise about Leader. And how telling it was of Superhero, to be honest I didn’t even clock this part until reading your gigantic and wonderful essay.
Some of Leader’s personality traits were on point: used to be obedient and moulding himself into what his “superiors” or captors want of him. The fact he doesn’t want to be in the way, to be a problem, to take too much(like Villain’s coat).
I especially love your sentence “effective and logical, even inmidst a breakdown” because that’s the kind of character I wanted him to be, the broken version of a strategist.
Also I didn’t pay much attention to the flower metaphor until you pointed it out. To me, it was just something superficial but when you put it in contrast with what being like a flower usually means, it holds much more meaning. I didn’t know my writing could have this many layers.
You caught so many little things I didn’t think of, you made my story so much richer, visceral and coherent than I thought it was with the little details:
Escaping that doesn’t give any relief. The mannequins who represent what Leader is supposed to be. The mirror that allows Leader to see himself in his captors’ eyes. The mention of SA to say it didn’t happen but actually it may mean it might have been anterior to the story (oops my bad). The deep breath mantra. Leader’s procedures and bargains.
I didn’t know my own writing could evoke such vivid emotions either “walking across shards of glass”, “takes your heart and crushes it to dust”, “being stabbed in the chest would have been kinder”. Am I the author who did that to you? Don’t mind me if I do that again >:)
Honestly, I would need to write an essay to properly respond to your comment.
This has been all over the place (way less coherent than what you did, props to you by the way). I’ll write the next part now. I’m a little scared it won’t be as good as the first one.
PS: would you allow me to print your answer and hang it on a wall? :3
Pillowfort is not dead (never has been). It's just smaller. If you join it, it will be bigger!
Pillowfort is consistently getting new features and improvements based on user feedback
Pillowfort is free to join without invites. Think AO3 waitlist. You'll be ready to go in a few hours at most.
Pillowfort was not "made by antis" (lmao)
Pillowfort is completely user funded, and thus will never enshittify
Pillowfort allows NSFW, is sex worker friendly (as far as US law allows) and banned AI images*
Pillowfort does not have reblog replies, on purpose, only comments. You own and control your own posts, forever.
Pillowfort is planning Ask Boxes, UX improvements, better image uploading, and tons more
Pillowfort is not owned by a transphobic techbro douchebag
Pillowfort has been around for seven years, where other small social media has withered and died. Cohost came and went all within PF's lifetime.
Pillowfort is small. It is buggy. It has no video or audio, only Youtube embeds. It runs on 7k/month, mostly spent on moderators. They use their resources as best they can, and have built a damn resilient product for it.
Pillowfort is trying to build a better, sustainable internet, without venture capital tricks destroying good services. It's not impossible, just harder, and slower. Don't believe the defeatists.
Pillowfort is not for everybody. The only way you'll find out whether you like it is by trying it.
\*: Linking to AI images is technically allowed if tagged, but PF will never host them, no exceptions.
An update for users in Brazil and the United Kingdom
To continue our commitment to user safety and to comply with local laws, we will start using age groups to determine access to certain experiences.
People in Brazil or in the UK, who are 18 or older, will soon need to verify their age to change content label settings and view mature-labeled content. Until then, the settings will be locked to hide.
As a reminder, verification is handled by our age-assurance partner, k-ID. Tumblr won't have access to the information you submit, just the final age-verification result. Documents are deleted after confirmation, and facial scan data never leaves your device.
Questions? Contact Tumblr support or learn more about these changes here.
Hey @changes do you want to do something about the overwhelming majority of transfem users' posts and profiles being summarily marked as mature before applying any version of this policy to TERF island?
what if we move it to Saturday so there's more time to advertise and because people have more time to be online Saturday so everyone not being online makes a bigger difference? Is that how that works
For anyone who might be confused abt dates, if You didnt protest today (or like me, didnt know this was happening until today-) the black out dya would be in the saturday 16th!!! I'll check in the Blackouts discord if this is a multiday or single day thing
I’m once again tagging most of the people I know, the UK have had laws about ID verification for years and Tumblr does this only now. The reasons about why this age verification sounds fishy at best are better explained here.
People don’t have to participate for all those days and don’t even have to participate. I’m just spreading the word.
@cassiavioletblue, @hoshi-no-koinu, @dakshii, @asch-3it, @cesspitoflove, @piplupfluffwritingstuff2, @just-a-space-rabbit, @the-modern-typewriter, @soosmain (I’m calling you once more for the Warhammer community), @reekatillion, @neon-kazoo, @ruins-of-a-lover, @lemonlimekodkod, @bloodiedbriars, @befuddled-calico-whump, @whooooomp, @foundfamilywhump, @yourlocalfandomfriendo I think this might interest you too, @birdie-likes, @waterc0l0r
Also just a reminder that Tumblr isn’t the only platform out there. I’m also personally also on Pillowfort and I’ve got links to access this site. The site isn’t Tumblr (there’s way less activity there) but for as far as I know, they don’t have age verification implemented and people have much more freedom over what they post.
Welcome to the masterlist dedicated to Leader and his multiple iterations. The stories themselves won't be written in order and stories will be added from other masterlists (the links and summaries will shamelessly be copy-pasted).
But I'll try my best to make this as chronological and coherent as possible.
On Leader: A rough outline of the timelines featuring Leader.
Main timeline 1 (I have yet to name those timelines and truly organise them)
Hard beginning: Young!Leader
Blue and white: Leader had been saved by Villain after Superhero had left him to die. Villain was happy to have a doll which they can dress whoever they wanted. Leader's feelings about the situation evolved as time passed.
Themes: doll whump, compliant Leader, ambiguous Villain, whump to comfort
Caged
Tied
Moodboard for Caged and Tied, made by @cassiavioletblue as well :D
Bound
Trapped, Quiet life
Trapped, The special place
Unsure Steps: In-between Young!Leader and Older!Leader
A dance: Leader is anxious at the idea of negotiating peace with Supervillain during the ball. Fortunately Villain’s presence dispels those concerns, especially when they ask him for a dance. Leader x villain, ball room, dance, character being dipped (if it interests someone :) ), comfort
Warm Bloom: Older!Leader
Triangle sandwich: Villain and Leader have a sweet conversation in the kitchen as Leader prepares triangle sandwiches for dinner. Leader x Lover!Villain, domestic fluff, sweet
A good, relaxing time: Leader is exhausted after a long day. However, Villain always has the perfect way to make him spend a good night regardless. spicy, comfort, consent, Leader x Lover!Villain
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tumblr just added an update that requires you to verify your age in order to view "mature content". I'm not sure how they do the verification (haven't yet checked), but given recent similar updates from things like Discord, it most likely involves sending them a photo of either your face or your ID.
In addition, over the past few months, and also years in the long-term, tumblr has been incorrectly marking things as mature content. These include:
Notifications about missing persons and requests for help
Posts about youth liberation
Posts about sex education
Posts about how the mature content is poorly implemented
Posts about being trans, more specifically about trans women and transmisogyny by both tumblr and users on tumblr
Non-sexual selfies by trans women/transfems
Trans womens'/transefems' ENTIRE BLOGS even if the blog contains no sexual content
Reblogs made by various blogs, mostly trans women, which add no additional content but somehow are marked as containing mature content, when the original post is not
Posts talking about racism and antiblackness both on and off tumblr
Posts by black people, especially black trans people, that are non-sexual
And likely many more I haven't seen
In essence, this update has mandated that a majority of users (within the UK and Brazil) must either a) submit their personal information to tumblr, a website whose moderation has been EXTREMELY biased against marginalised people and who I would not trust with my ID, or b) be excluded from absolutely all conversations tumblr decides are "mature content", whether they are actually sexual in nature or not. Furthermore, anyone not over 18 will also not be allowed to take part in these conversations, or even see them, or interact with many trans women or people of colour on this site, as tumblr decides.
This update is complete bullshit designed to censor and exclude marginalised people, poorly hidden under a guise of "protecting teenagers from sexual content", and they know it.
EDIT: This update apparently only affects users in the UK or Brazil, like me. This is still bullshit even if it's just some people.
When I looked at some of the comment, I've seen someone say the age verification law in the UK was already present before and Tumblr is doing this just now.
I don't know what to make of this honestly.
@cassiavioletblue, @cesspitoflove (I don't know if you've already reblogged something like this), @just-a-space-rabbit, @piplupfluffwritingstuff2
@blackout-strike would it be wise to make a black out for this?
for those like me who cannot install alternative android forks on their phone because the phone in question is thoroughly unrootable, I would recommend downloading anyapk on your phone while you still can. In their own words:
anyapk is a lightweight Android application installer that bypasses Google's developer verification requirements by using local ADB (Android Debug Bridge) connections. Smoothly install any APK file on your device without restrictions, gatekeepers, or corporate approval.
If you're reading this after Google's lockdown date and are unable to install anyapk the regular way, there is a method outlined on the github linked above which tells you how to install anyapk on your phone by plugging it into a computer with ADB installed on it. Once you have anyapk on your phone, you will not have to do that ever again (unless you delete anyapk off your phone)
[Description for the second image: a post from jrepin that reads:
"Sideloading" is the rentseeker word for "being able to run software of your choosing on a computing device you purchased". There is no reasonable case for an operating system developer having a say over what programs you run on your hardware.
--Eugen Rochko of Mastodon https://mastodon.social/@Gargron/115093185284473606]