The Blog Of A Weirdo

friend who went to bed is a type of dead wife

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

thy mother

Art thou for fucking real

Official joy and whimsy post

a customer today looked at me, said “y’know? i think you’ll appreciate this,” and pulled his shirt down to show me his supernatural tattoo. calling me a slur would’ve been easier

i don't really want to weight in on the "using big words in your writing is ableist" discourse happening on tiktok because i'm like 90% certain it's an anti-intellectual psyop to stir up drama in online circles to promote the use of ai to summarize literally everything and thus feeding the LLMs and lowering the populace's mistrust of such tools but i also have to say: dictionaries and thesauruses are the most accessible they've ever been. if you use an e-reader of any kind you can look up a word without leaving the page. there's a plethora of online dictionaries and if you just type a word + "meaning" into google it'll usually give you a definition. we used to have pocket dictionaries we used when reading in class. i have two on my shelf right now that i used in high school. stop letting the fascists purposefully misuse anti-ableism rhetoric to trick you into never thinking again.

"on god's green earth" is way too fun to say even when you don't believe in god and know most of it is blue, actually

I'm still thinking about the guy who saw me realize my wheelchair wouldn't fit in the elevator because he (also a wheelchair user) was already inside it and immediately quipped, "This elevator ain't accessible enough for the both of us."

disabled ppl we need to start lying to nosy people okay? you tell me i'm too young to need a cane and i will tell you point blank that maybe you should tell that to the guy who ran me over. you don't get an explanation of my health issues you get lies and depending on how much of an asshole i want to be that lie will be anything from a humble car crash to a 1 billion lions attack. mind yr business.

"i could never live like that" well maybe you'll have to because this happened overnight. yeah you heard me i was the most able bodied man in the world but then one morning bam i woke up disabled. yeah you could have that too. there's no cure either you'll just wake up one morning and now you have to live like me

"what happened" well have you ever seen looney tunes? yeah an anvil landed on me and squished me flat.

NO ONE GETS THEIR ASS BEAT IN A POLL LIKE GASTON

This is the greatest insult in the history of television.

Back when I was a redditor (😔) I realized a strange phenomenon. No one cares about your original posts, but if you make the post on another site and screenshot it, people assume it’s a tweet from someone who is known/is funny/etc and the post would do way better

we all love dynamics that remind us of the moon and the sun but I am baffled by the lack of love for dynamics that are reminiscent of the moon and the EARTH.

I am so full of life but you are the reason my tides have a rhythm. you are the reason my oceans are brimming with life. you are the reason I can see the light in myself even when it all seems dark and you are the reason my orbit is stable and my seasons make sense. do you see it

Moon has scars from meteors that would’ve otherwise hit us

AOAOIUUHHH. NOBODY TALK TO ME

man sometimes friendship really is just "I saw this and knew it would give you psychic damage. please respond with agony" and then they do. and it's great

Oh, to be a little kitten who just got vaccinated and then taken to a high-end restaurant and tasted the best food the chefs could offer and then fell asleep in a basket.