Oh Dear

thinking about the “foogoo state” post

can't believe the only options are 30 minutes early or 10 minutes late. if only there were some other way. but what can you do

we're moving to an internet where children would be banned from reaching out for help and friendship online but abusive parents can post their children's every second online to humiliate and expose them for money with no pushback

Why is it that every time I google something like "Are olives poisonous to cats" the top results are always like "Fun fact: Cats are carnivores! This means that they eat meat. There is no reason to include olives in a cat's diet. You should feed your cat cat food, which is dry or wet food especially designed for cats. You can purchase this at a store." like is there a single person alive on the planet who's googled "Are blueberry muffins safe for cats" because they're planning on switching their cat to a muffin-only diet??? No, I'm asking because the little bastard somehow popped open the packet while I was putting away the groceries and dragged one under the couch before I could react and now I need to know if I should call the after-hours vet. "Cats should not eat spaghetti." NO SHIT, SHERLOCK!!!! "Try to keep human food away from cats." i live in a studio apartment with a completely silent and permanently hungry apex predator who has the intelligence of a toddler and the desperate Machiavellian cunning of a creature who spent his formative months on the streets. He can already open doors and he is this 👌 close to learning how to open the microwave. He is stronger than me and covered in knives. So im gonna do my best but for the moment i just need you to tell me whether this yoghurt is going to kill my son y/n

For plants specifically, there’s also a wildly detailed set of posts and listings about toxicity on the old, wonderful, Plants Are the Strangest People blog

what’s the word for post nut clarity but for situations

the word i was looking for was hindsight

Pipe sprung a leak in the bathroom the other day and the cat came and bothered me about it and I can't stop thinking about it. She doesn't know what a towel or a mop is but she knew there was an unauthorised fucking Wet and she trusted my ability to rectify the situation

I swear I am going to start a seminar in How to Exist in Public. We do not block our coworker from getting their food out of one microwave while waiting for our food in the other microwave. We do not walk four carts abreast through the grocery store, nor do we park our cart next to an end cap and wander off to another aisle. We do not start making a left turn we will not be able to complete, thereby bringing the entire intersection to a screeching halt. We do not stop dead in the middle of the hallway to answer a text. We live in a society.

Both options convey that he's horny