Lokahi Panda

(no beers in) does anyone wanna keep me as their house pet forever

"safety" can also present as "useful". You have some intrinsic value that cannot be taken from you (because of some sex/kink thing). The safety is from abandonment, because you're useful, despite everything. And "useful" is a bunch of kinks (none of which I'm comfortable mentioning here).

oh no, animal ears are feet

yeah. cat ears are feet!

can someone turn this into the calvin's dad dialogue

oh god, this is so obviously calvin's dad dialogue that now I'm worried that I plagiarized it without realizing it

the two types of tumblr post are calvin's dad and rule 34. all posts fall into one of these two categories. despite being kink-related, this post is actually calvin's dad.

they hate us control freaks for making sure everyone else does things the correct way

never thought the dad was hot before

Tumblr speech patterns really are indistinguishable from Calvin and Hobbes, and I'm starting to think that's not a coincidence

the problem with movie remakes is that they always remake something that was already good, meaning at worst you ruin it and at best your remake is largely redundant. to make a truly good remake you need to start with source material that is absolute dogwater. ignore the pull of nostalgia. redeem the sins of moviemaking past.

REMAKE THE MONOLITH MONSTERS YOU COWARDS!!!

FUCK. i think i have to learn blender

the humble manual smoothie maker after they break their hands:

every day i log in here and get beat up by genies

the horse when asked what he would like for dinner

put a bullet in me already why dont you

^ Harry du Bois would say that.