Crackfic Idea: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets but Ginny Weasley thinks Diary Tom is an LLM chatbot. So let's say the books inexplicably take place in the 2020s and Hermione went on a rant about AI over the summer, but because the Weasleys have no idea what a datacentre or the internet is, they believe it works by writing on special paper that provides answers to any question. Ginny gets the diary and assumes this is what she's found.
But because the Diary Tom only has power if you get close with him emotionally, he can't influence Ginny at all because she's only writing things like "generate an essay on the magical properties of griffon's blood" and treats him like a tool. Hermione talked about how LLMs are unreliable, don't stay on topic, and hallucinate, so whenever Diary Tom tries to convince Ginny he's not a chatbot, she just thinks the diary is faulty.
Eventually he has to start playing the role because it's the only way he can get Ginny to do anything. "I'm sorry, you've run out of RiddleChat tokens. Please deposit two litres of rooster blood to continue."













