you should be working...

norman reedus and his son mingus dont look related at all

fuck you thats not his name

Mood

Mood

mood

school is over!! u know what that means!! ;)

*doesnt know how to manage unstructured time*

ass

ass

likes

ass

Please Stop Reblogging This. Tumblr’s New Notification System Is Killing Me. Ple

Hell Is Not Worth The Price Of This

Dude this one customer was like MY SON HAS TO GET A JOB AND STOP MOOCHING OFF MY MONEY. And I was like “how old is he?” And she was like “17” and I was like. Holy shit you’re a freak! Lmao. Like teens can get jobs sure but he’s still a child you’re responsible for acting like he’s mooching off you when it’s YOUR responsibility to take care of him. What a fucking freak I hate capitalism lmao

Imagine actually acting like this @ your child I can’t get over how evil this is

I feel like this could be useful in my future

REBLOG THIS. I CANNOT STRESS HOW IMPORTANT THIS GUIDES ARE, BOOST THIS SHIT

If I don’t reblog this one of these things is definitely going to happen to me

this will help me when i panic

insta influencers travelling to the chernobyl exclusion zone (and spending thousands of dollars to get there) only to pose next to contaminated debris and raise their chances of developing cancer bc of a popular docudrama sounds like an onion article but we really are living in a society huh

THE LAST ONE REALLY GOT NAKED LIKE WHAT

do it

People were asking for an update, so here it is. Many of you have advised me to make the site, collect the likes and tag the woman in every post I make until she sees that my page is more popular than hers. Although that advice was solid, it wasn’t really my style. But you know what is my style? Patience. So, I waited until Pawble Trouble got to a thousand likes (which took less than a week thanks to all of you) before I started inviting my Facebook friends to like the page. More specifically, everyone who was a mutual of me and the woman. A lot of them did like it and liked the posts and pictures of my dogs. I guess she saw one of the posts on her timeline and she saw the page, because a few days ago, she stopped me to sourly congratulate me on making the site. She was like, “It looks…nice.” And I was like, “Yeah, doesn’t it? So glad I didn’t listen to you.” 

Yes, the line that kills. Well done, very well done. 

[rain pouring] [thunder rumbling] [car horn blaring] “go on. wheyyyyyyy!! Oh no.” [in distance: “YOU IDIOT”, uproarious laughter] “why would you go through that. what are you doing. ahhh no, he’s actually floating!” “well of course he is. what a fucking bellend!” “what a knobhead!” “fucking hell.”

ASMR. Rain AND instant cosmic punishment.

homophobes are not allowed to use computers because the inventor of the computer was gay

People think this is just a joke but Alan Turing was the inventor of the computer and his sexuality was illegal in his time (which was not even 100 years ago) and he was arrested. They put him on drugs that destroyed his genius brain and committed suicide a year after being covicted. He was gay and a war hero as well. He helped to break enigma which was a German code that they put all their messages through. He shorted WWII by two years and saved so many lives in the process.

Friendly reminder that if not for Alan Turing you wouldn’t be reading this post and we might be ruled by the nazis

wait fuck this is soooooo important always reblog

hope your pets stay healthy in 2017

I almost didn’t blog this and felt guilty

Not risking it

hope ya pets even healthier in 2018

hope your pets discover immortality in 2019

clap BACK

what the hell

This makes me really chuffed

goddamnit.

all of you go to hell

And you wonder why i am boggled at times

These are called contronyms! A word that is its own opposite.

Why the fuck do these exist

One theory is that the sarcastic use of the word became exceedingly prevalent and because another dictionary definition. 

Are you telling me that we were such sarcastic shits it literally changed our language.

speaking as a linguist: yes. that is exactly what happened. isn’t it beautiful.

i think i laughed a little too hard