needs more swashbuckling and/or explosions

From the Reno Gazette-Journal, July 20, 1908.

MAN DIES AFTER EATING LIBRARY PASTE GOLDFIELD, Nev., July 20.–A post-mortem examination was performed by Dr. Turner, the county physician, on the remains of the unknown man who died near the automobile garage. As a result, the doctor has concluded that the man was nearly starved, and that he had eaten the contents of a glass jar of library paste. The digestive and respiratory organs showed a badly run-down condition. The identity of the man has not been determined beyond the fact of his having a letter addressed to the name of Ross.

For context, library paste was largely flour and water, but also contained toxic chemicals – not enough to hurt someone healthy, but deadly in large amounts for a homeless man on the edge of starvation. Mr. Ross, the man the letter was addressed to, apparently didn’t recognize him, and as far as I know there’s no information about the contents of the letter. I’ve seen people say this is a hoax because the headstone looks too new and nice but the historic cemetery in Goldfield is genuinely very well looked after and most of the older markers are in this red-on-white-paint style.

I am very much a person who believes in laughing at the absurdity of death. I think it’s also worth remembering that this is a man who died in genuinely terrible circumstances, in a place where no one would ever call him by name again.

Eris the fallen angel

But it meant that we had absolutely no help or support when we were trying to work on the relationship in ways that *did* value my autonomy. There's basically no advice for people who want to try to make a relationship where there's a big desire gap work that isn't "well you should just have sex anyway" or "just break up lol". And that sucks!

Just after giving birth, during a family crisis, during a mental health episode, during health problems, during stressful periods at work

There are a lot of times when one person is horned up and raring to go and the other has no interest

And the solution often presented is that the person who is going through something should just put out because they are the problem instead of like...finding ways to engage in non sexual intimacy to reaffirm closeness

An asexual person is going to get 10x the amount of pressure and blame put on them and no advice on how non-sexual intimacy can help their relationships and if they get that at all it will only be to sell it as a bridge to sex they don't want.

I really hate the selling of intimacy as only equaling or facilitating sex. Intimacy comes in many forms and should be explored more by every couple as a non sexual act. And it the given importance it deserves. In fact I would argue if we as a society put more value on non sexual intimacy more relationships would be happier and healthier

people would stop getting shit

for being themselves.