Me

Fucking Schrödinger's Senator

(some guy on the internet voice) it's so unrealistic and forced when women win fights against men in stories. of course, when a young boy defeats a huge man I'm cheering and screaming because it is so badass, and when a frail old man defeats a cocky young warrior I feel nothing but satisfaction. I love these power fantasies about easily dispatching people who underestimate you, a thing I desire despite the fact that I will likely never have the skill to achieve it in real life, but I'm pretty sure women don't have that same desire, and even if they do, they shouldn't get to see it in media. because it's so unrealistic, you see. I mean I'm smart enough to know I can't take down a big man in a fight but the women, you know, they'll get ideas. I could probably do it if I trained hard enough, but the women??? for some reason I can't see it happening, and who can say why that is.

a pit of dread forms in your stomach as you parse my "evil baby on board" decal and realize you have a moral duty to rear end my vehicle as hard as you can

the lion does not concern herself with papa

Does anybody know if we have to wake up tomorrow

hey don't cry. on december 3, 1926, agatha christie went missing for eleven days and because the uk police didn't know what to do they recruited sir arthur conan doyle, creator of master detective sherlock holmes, but all he did was conduct a séance to try and contact her distressed spirit

Her “disappearance” was also greatly exaggerated, she was under a lot of stress from the public and had just caught her first husband cheating on her, so she fucked off to a spa treatment hotel and checked in with a fake name as a “patient” claiming to not remember anything about her past. She kept up the illusion of mystery for most of her life, claiming to not know anything about what happened during that time, but in her twilight years she alluded to the fact that “of course I just ran away for a bit, wouldn’t you want to do the same?”

I love this website so much

the camera man slayed so jard

i’m really sorry about my behavior. you see, growing up, my family- *remembers blaming all my problems on other people is really annoying and unhealthy* i mean. i am responsible for all the evils of this world and i bear sins like the sky bears the stars

once you realize you don’t actually need to sleep, you can really (stops talking abruptly and stares straight ahead for 4 minutes)

anybody out there hiring gay losers. ideally a 100k/year salary and i work for one hour every day when i feel like it. thanks

dude star wars is so good and/or bad and/or mediocre sometimes, depending