LILY IS LOUD

This is a combination of things I’ve heard Ellen Degeneres say, my own insights on life as it’s happening, misquoted phrases by famous gurus on widely distributed memes, and random statements I’ve heard that gave me an “Aha!” epiphany moment which I felt was life-changing.  My little sister inspired #5 on the list.  

It’s important that you know this.

No, I have not directly credited everyone else I’ve been inspired by in the creation of this list.  It was my own personal list that I never planned on sharing publicly. So, I was noting the message behind their statements more than who said the words.  I admit I definitely do not follow it as much as I would like to.  It’s a work in progress.  

Either way, here is the list.

LILY KHUU’S MORAL COMPASS:

1. Be kind to everyone.  Even if they’re being a jerk.  They might be having a bad day and one moment doesn’t define an entire person.

2. Stay grounded and mindful.  Otherwise, you’ll float away... And probably step on somebody’s foot.  Or accidentally drive your car into their house.

3. Always recognize the positives.  Being optimistic doesn’t always change an icky situation, but realizing what’s good about it makes it more bearable.

4. Express gratitude often.  The more specific the better.  People may not notice when you thank them, but they most certainly will when you don’t.

5. Done is better than perfect. Mistakes are signs of improvement.  If you don’t start doing right now, you will end up on your death bed having never tried.  Favorite quote by Amy Poehler: “Doing is the thing.  Not the talking about the thing that is the thing.  It’s the actual doing of it that is the thing.”

6. Treat others how they want to be treated.  Not everyone is the same, so the phrase “treat other’s how you want to be treated,” doesn’t work when you bring your gluten-intolerant wife your favorite chocolate wheat-flour cake.

7. It’s okay to think differently. You can still be friends with people you disagree with.  Our unique experiences are what make us interesting.  It’s also what gives us different perspectives from each other. And that’s okay.

8. Choose reactions wisely.  We can’t control what other people say.  We can’t control what other people do.  But, we can control how we react.  Sometimes it’s better to step away and breathe before doing anything at all.

9. Prioritize people who inspire.  Make the people who positively impact your life important.  If someone is providing you with joy or motivation in your life, reciprocate their nice acts with your own.  Especially people who respect healthy boundaries and communicate kindly.

10. Pause.  A lot.  Taking a moment to think before responding to an offer or request will help you make a better decision.  Saying “no” frequently and “yes” sparingly is also okay.  You have one life.  What you do with it is up to you.  Healthy boundaries are essential for maintaining a peaceful balance.

I wanted to title this Comedy 101, but that would be a lie.

It’s not like I've never taken a comedy class before or performed as a comedian, so I cannot honestly pretend that I’ve never been exposed to the world that is being a human clown in hopes that somebody will find me funny and a musical orchestra of laughs will illuminate the air filling that dreadful void of emptiness with the validation of about 20-100 strangers (depends on venue size and turnout) that fuels the next act of humiliation in hopes for another fix.

I’m not completely un-self-aware.  I know what this shit is about.

Us comics are addicts.  We’re addicted the high that only comes from the laughs of complete strangers.

That first paragraph was the longest sentence I’ve ever written.

And not really a paragraph.

__________

So... back to the point.

_________

Setup and Punch

The last time I performed comedy was stand-up in Long Beach, California at a lesbian event in 2017.  That’s two years ago.  Before that was some open mics and a few performances at The Upright Citizen’s Brigade which I will forever remain proud of for my turnout and strength of laughter frequencies.  We need to come up with a real term to measure the laughs.  Wait.  Does this already exist?  See?  This is why I consider myself a newb still.  Before that was mostly booking comedy shows, comedy acting roles in theatrical productions, or comedy improv performances. Recently, I have produced several comedy shows, but intentionally did not perform in any of them because I didn’t “feel ready”.  What a lame excuse.

Basically, it’s been a while since I’ve actively performed comedy.

What have I been doing since then?

DJing for nightclubs while aggressively avoiding a comedy career due to perfectionism and fears of failure. To get back into things gently I’ve decided to refresh myself on the basics via a comedy workshop created by female comics for female comics.  Amazing!  I remember watching a documentary about women in comedy and learning that only 5% of comics are female.  One of my most memorable moments was sharing cocktails with a group of female stand-up comedians while we nonchalantly shared our roofie stories -- because every. single. one of us. had been roofied by a male comic.

Times are-a-changin’.

The first exercise, of this workshop, was to respond to about FIFTY writing prompts.  This took me several days and some serious self-confrontation.  The purpose of this assignment was to discover who we are and what makes us unique and develop inspiration for writing comedy material.

The second exercise was simple: Write a basic joke.  A setup and punch.

After scoring the list of writing prompts and picking my favorite ones, I present to you... 

THE FIRST JOKE:

I was born and raised in the state of Florida and managed to get out without having been arrested for biting someones face off while high on crystal meth. 

I only bit off their hand.

Have you ever thrown a hate party?

Where you convince yourself you’re justified in feeling resentful towards someone else because you’ve decided that they are the main source of everything bad in your life?

That your own actions have nothing to do with your empty bank account, loss of identity, and overwhelming need to eat everything over 1000 calories per bite?

Yeah... me, either.

I have no idea where to start.  So, I decided to just start.

Comedy is something I have always loved since my dead-beat dad mailed me a box of bootlegged South Park videos when I was but in my ripened grade-schooler years of eight-years-old.  In hindsight, I think it was his two-birds approach to both developing me into a monster that would drive my mother insane while also showing his affection by shipping me illegally stolen art.  

What a creative fellow.

I’ve been putting off living the life I know -- deep down -- I am meant to live because perfectionism has had quite a grip on me.  Perfectionism is really common in us damaged control-freaks.  Having a sense of superiority in achievement really helps to bandage the feelings of complete utter chaos which internally rips apart any sense of stability or worthiness.

As I write this I know that there is no audience on the other end to gauge and comply to for laughs.  This was done on purpose -- because putting myself out there would mean being put under a spotlight opening myself up for failure.  Something us perfectionists loath.  This is why I purposely left my last name out of the title.  At some point, this will have to change.