Jul 17
I HATE how disgustingly self destructive I get. I get angry or overly upset and suddenly I come back into reality with bruises and marks. Or even short or chopped hair from how I just start cutting at it.
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I HATE how disgustingly self destructive I get. I get angry or overly upset and suddenly I come back into reality with bruises and marks. Or even short or chopped hair from how I just start cutting at it.
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I cannot believe that I finally took a few pictures of me that I liked. It almost makes me.
Want to die
the worst thing about the existance of john linnell is that you are just casually being a fan of him and then you are reminded that hes literally the best person on earth and one of the most talented songwriters ever and then you remembered how much you want to make music and how much you sucks and you get so jealous of him and you feel that nothing really fucking matters and your life is gladly being ruined by inferiority, yeah
Being single and horny at 42 makes me feel like such a piece of shit and I hate it.
dean lets sam fuck him like he’s trying to punish both of them for wanting it. he keeps his eyes closed the whole time, as if not looking at sam will make it feel less wrong
it doesn’t work
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why am i not allowed to be pretty like EVERYONE ELSE
I feel fucking disgusting. My hair is awful, my skin is bad, my face is ugly and my body is awful. I hate how pathetic I am to everyone and my childishness.
I don't deserve people in my life. I'm just pathetic and useless.
tw slight mention of sh, self loathing
im such a hypocrite, i wish for things i cant give myself, i want someone to vent to but i cant hear other people vent without wanting to kms, i want everyone for myself and get upset when others have that i js want friends that feel like they love me i feel lonely in a group of my friends i go quiet and sit there and they complain when i leave i watch them enjoy things i don't get and it feels like im piloting a body then living in my own skin, i want to be loved and yet i cant do that for someone right now, i tell others not to hurt themself and yet i do it, why is being a hypocrite such a negative thing? why do i have to be selfless why cant i be selfish? because all those "positive" traits that i portray in front of people only make me tired and depressed i want someone to read this and comfort me and yet i dont reply to anyone else's vents bc it makes me hurt more, seeing pain in others makes my pain feel all that much worse, i want my friends to be happy but i want them to be happy with me