Kit

if i were a drink i’d be cherry vanilla coke

if you were a drink what would you be

everyone’s like “bleach” or “sewage” please calm down edgelords

at the start of the game karlach and astarion are absolutely fucking reeling from being suddenly freed and are in a state of manic joy that would probably seem alien to them like a week ago, while gale has been locked in his depression tower for so long he's almost completely forgotten how to talk to people. shadowheart has not a single fucking clue whats going on because shar keeps slurping up her memories and lae'zel is literally in the midst of her ultimate nightmare scenario and trapped on an alien planet with a bunch of jackasses who have no idea whats happening. so almost everyone has experienced a situational personality shift and isn't quite the person they were a year before you met them. EXCEPT Wyll. Who is just like "this isnt even the weirdest thing thats happened to me this month." my man got scooped up, tadpoled, and slammed back and said "oh well, not gonna ruin my day" and went about his business teaching self defense to children and slaying evil beasts. He didn't even seem confused he literally did not give a shit. no urgency. He's like "I'll put that in my day planner but is gonna have to wait until after i hunt down this demon." When you recruit him there is no sense of "oh man we really gotta help each other because we have the same problem" he just would have said yes because you asked and he's wyll. Or because you told him he could kill mindflayers. He'd be like "sick" and done, no questions asked. Just another Tuesday for the blade.

walter white christmas and his sidekick jingles the elf are making pepperminthamphetamines at this current moment

the way i know astarion would be like By all means. Come on in and say what you need to say to him. Not that you need the invitation. and gale would just be like :) Okay awesome ! then plop down and immediately start talking like it’s nothing. beautiful picture

#he pulls up a chair and sits and puts a throw pillow on his lap and puts his elbows on his knees #and just starts with ‘so i was thinking about our battle earlier-‘ #astarion cuts him off like ‘hey real quick do you mind if i-‘ #‘no no please don’t mind me. anyway when we were fighting i think-‘ #like are you kidding me. like it’s so normal to him. he’s just like Yeah Whatever. #Tav nods to Gale mid convo and astarion’s like ‘don’t do that i’m gonna spill’ #so tav keeps hittin gale with a 👌 so he knows he’s listening. #insanity. #there’s something so *clenches fist* #about gale being tav and astarion’s best friend. third wheeling but it’s their whole dynamic.

If I had the death note I wouldn’t even care about killing people the real kicker is that you can bend their will before they die. Like who cares if I could give joe biden a heart attack BUT i could make him go up the the podium and say something like “I need a thick girl and a blunt right now or I’ll die” and then he explodes. That’s where the money is

do you guys think cavemen argued with each other about media consumption

grug spend too much time listening to story

the thing is that we need duke of hell crowley now more than ever because like. okay so. so i’m just thinking like. hold on. so okay. so have you heard of night shift by lucy dacus

[video description: A Baldur's Gate 3 screencap showing Wyll sounding the ogre warhorn. The horn sounds and nothing happens, so he says: "It's like I always sometimes say. You can't summon dead ogres, no matter how hard you blow." /End description]