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Sometimes I read some posts or listen people talking, and I think people tend to forget that personality disorders such as ASPD don't just appear out of nowhere ?
Yes, genetic predispositions exist, but genetics and environment usually work together. A person can have the genetic predisposition and never develop the disorder. A person can experience a bad childhood environment and still not develop it either. There is no single factor that guarantees an outcome.
The same applies to conduct disorder. While conduct disorder in childhood is one of the strongest predictors of ASPD later in life, it is not a certainty. Not everyone diagnosed with CD will go on to meet the criteria for ASPD.
That's why I get frustrated when people talk about ASPD as if it's simply a choice, a mindset, or something someone develops because "life sucks." It doesn't work that way. ASPD is a disorder, and regardless of whether someone embraces it, functions well with it, or even takes pride in certain aspects of it, it still remains a disorder.
I also don't understand why some people romanticize these conditions.
Many people with ASPD, NPD, and related personality disorders grew up in environments marked by neglect, abuse, violence, manipulation, instability, or other forms of chronic adversity. Not everyone has the same story, but difficult developmental experiences are common. Yet people will either tell them how "cool" their disorder is or reduce them to being terrible people because of it.
Most people only see the label.
They see the lack of empathy, the lack of guilt, the manipulation, the utilitarian view of relationships, the impulsivity, or the disregard for social rules.
They see the diagnosis.
What they often fail to see is the actual person behind it.
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hope its okay to ask but can you give sources on PPD? its a pain in the ass to find sources
I'm not sure exactly what type of sources you mean [treatment, diagnosis, or just general information/research], but @/hauntedselves and @/psychresources have a good amount posts on PPD. Also searching on Google Scholar for "Paranoid PD" or "Paranoid Personality Disorder" ["PPD" usually brings up Postpartum Depression] but many of them are paywalled. iirc Sci-Hub or other similar websites to get past paywalls still exist but don't take my word for it [also I have no idea how safe they are and I don't want to be responsible for people getting viruses]
here's some direct links :
Psychresources' PPD Resources Masterlist
Psychresources' post with a link to a free text version of Personality Disorders in Modern Life (2nd edition)
These also exist but keep in mind that both of the below are .com websites and thus might not be the most accurate or in depth information
Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD) - Etiology, pathophysiology, symptoms, signs, diagnosis & prognosis from the Merck Manuals - Medical Pro
Learn about the persistent and long-standing symptoms of paranoid personality disorder and how this condition can be diagnosed and treated.
Compulsive behavior as a direct result of these obsessions
Compulsions often get in the way of the rest of their life
Symptoms are distressing and unwanted
Symptoms may be egodystonic (go against their beliefs and values)
Specific themes or behaviors fluctuate and change over time
OCPD
Personality disorder (affects entire personality)
Strong desire to be in control
Strong value of perfectionism
Inflexible and rigid
Dedicated to work over relationships
Less likely to seek professional help
Difficulty delegating tasks to others
Extreme conscientiousness
Symptoms more consistent over time
Symptoms may be egosyntonic (align with their beliefs and values)
May not feel like anything about their behavior is wrong or inappropriate; may feel that they are simply being reasonable
Both
Perfectionism behavior (possibly)
Obsessive behavior
Inflexible and rigid ideas/beliefs/ethics
Fear of losing control
Scrupulosity (possibly)
Look similar on the outside, but feel different on the inside
Sources
Kelly, O. (2019). OCD vs. Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder. In Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/ocd-vs-obsessive-compulsive-personality-disorder-2510584
What is the difference between OCD and OCPD (compulsive personality)? (2023). The International OCPD Foundation. In The International OCPD Foundation. https://www.ocpd.org/articles/what-is-the-difference-between-ocd-and-ocpd-compulsive-personality
OCD vs. OCPD: Differences in Symptoms, Treatment, and More. (2022). In Psych Central. https://psychcentral.com/disorders/whats-the-difference-between-obsessive-compulsive-disorder-and-obsessive-compulsive-personality-disorder
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I find it so ironic how many stereotypes about narcissists aren't just inaccurate, but are actually the complete opposite of how the average narcissist thinks.
"narcissism is excessive self-love" when most narcissists feel shame more easily than non-narcs do.
"narcissists don't work hard" when most narcissists are prone to perfectionism.
"narcissists are abusers who only pretend to be victims" when most narcissists were abused in childhood and are often on the receiving end of abusive relationships in adulthood.
"narcissists don't try to fit in" when most narcissists are constantly watching for signs of respect or criticism, constantly adjusting our behavior so those around us will see us as competent and pleasant.
and then when you describe what narcissism is actually like, they insist that a narcissist would never act like that, that anyone who fits that description must just have post-traumatic stress or one of the "good" PDs (if they believe there are good ones, that is).
Naomi and Ayumi as a couple is also something that appeals to me deeply because tbh I don't think there's anyone who could understand what they went through better than each other. They're both victims of possession who struggle with their guilt and when Heavenly Host/The Darkening isn't actively messing with them, they're super supportive of one another.
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One of the best ones I saw was a thing noting that every single one of the few survivors of suicide jumps off of the Golden Gate Bridge realized, on the way down, that the problems they were killing themselves over actually were fixable or could be worked through...except for the now - extremely unfixable - problem of gravity.
Went to the Holocaust Museum in DC once. There was a video interview of an Auschwitz survivor who said he and some other prisoners stayed up all night with a man who wanted to kill himself. The man didn’t kill himself and survived to liberation.
In the video the survivor said “Never seek a permanent solution to a temporary problem. And they’re all temporary problems.”
Hearing that from a guy who survived the Holocaust rewired my brain a little bit.
I think something a lot of people don't understand is that depression is not suicidality, and suicidality is not depression.
People can, and are, depressed without being suicidal, and sometimes suicidality peaks as people are emerging from depression.
Suicidality is a wave, and the trick is to allow that wave to crest and subside WITHOUT acting on it.
Whatever it takes to ride it out. For some people that's distraction, like watching television. For others it's calling a friend -- not to talk about the suicidality, but just to talk. For others it could be as simple as going to sit in a coffee shop or library, because the presence of other people is a huge diminisher of suicide risk.
That's what suicide safety planning is about. It's like having any other type of emergency plan, like a plan for fire or evacuation. It's making a plan when you are in the frame of mind to do so, so that you can just DO the plan without having to think about it when the occasion arises.
When you're in the midst of suicidal ideation, or even intent, you're not in a problem-solving mood. So knowing past!you, with the help of a therapist hopefully, came up with the plan and all you have to do is follow up until the wave crests and subsides, is what allows you to see another day.
ETA: Here's a link to a safety plan. https://www.samhsa.gov/sites/default/files/988-safety-plan.pdf
There’s a really compassionate and well-written paper/book/thing called Suicide: The Forever Decision that’s written specifically for people who are currently suicidal. The letter to the reader at the beginning is wonderful and deeply understands how to talk to someone who’s suicidal without preaching or talking down to them.
It’s very honest. It’s very clear. It’s very kind. It presents you with a lot of information and a lot of understanding and lets you take it all in like the autonomous human you are, and make decisions from an informed place. It goes over the reality of suicide attempts, pain involved, likelihoods of survival, after effects of attempts, and how to get help if you want it after reading all of that and learning about the reality of suicide attempts.
You can read it for free here: https://qprinstitute.com/pdfs/Forever_Decision.pdf
No one can ever stop you if you’re really determined. Only you can stop yourself. If you’re suicidal and there’s ANY tiny part of you that wants a chance to not go down that route, but can’t convince the rest of you yet, give this short book a try. Or share it with anyone you know who might need it.
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