hort lies

So a while back (I can’t remember exactly when but I think it was some time around the 40s/50s), a bunch of penguins escaped. A keeper left the gate open so a bunch of penguins just… followed them. And the people loved it. Look at these adorable birds outside their cage just following that guy around! So they get all the penguins back inside and realise that none of them really ran off, they just followed the keeper and went back inside and crowd thought it was amazing, so why not make it a regular thing? Get enough people there that if one of them goes to make a run for it (which at least one has in the past), they can’t get past the people, and let the ones who want outside have a little wander. So every day, they get a crowd, they open the gate, and whatever penguins want to get out can go, waddle about, squawk at people, and then hop back inside.

“I know this is horrible,” del Toro continues. “You sound like a complete lunatic, but I saw a UFO. I didn’t want to see a UFO. It was horribly designed. I was with a friend. We bought a six-pack. We didn’t consume it, and there was a place called Cerro del Cuatro, “Mountain of the Four,” on the periphery of Guadalajara. We said, ‘Let’s go to the highway.’ We sit down to watch the stars and have the beer and talk. We were the only guys by the freeway. And we saw a light on the horizon going super-fast, not linear. And I said, ‘Honk and flash the lights.’ And we started honking.”

The UFO, says del Toro, “Went from 1,000 meters away [to much closer] in less than a second — and it was so crappy. It was a flying saucer, so clichéd, with lights [blinking]. It’s so sad: I wish I could reveal they’re not what you think they are. They are what you think they are. And the fear we felt was so primal. I have never been that scared in my life. We jumped in the car, drove really fast. It was following us, and then I looked back and it was gone.”

But this guy is just like “I saw a UFO and it was really fuckin cliche and badly put together 5/10 an okay alien spacecraft not great” and honestly that feels like absolutely the way we’d react to seeing stuff like this

When I worked in fast food for minimum wage, they would yell at us and lecture us about “stealing” fries and burgers (while we had to throw out TONS of food every day) as though the giant billion-dollar corporations of McDonald’s and Sonic couldn’t afford to give their employees something to eat (while not even paying us a living wage).

Now I work at an upscale restaurant (it’s fancy, like celebrities eat there fairly often) and not only do I make WAY better money but they give us 2 free meals a day (eaten on the clock) and they’re GOOD. Today I got baked cod, spring rolls, rice pilaf, stir fry, and mashed potatoes and eggplant. Oh, and free espresso and juice. From this restaurant owned by a local man who is in no way a billionaire.

“MONEY IS NOT THE ISSUE

Above ground:

My beautiful, opulent cactus abode, crafted with fine attention to detail with intentional asymmetric architecture to make the layout pop and give it life

Below ground:

griffin

“You know, an Orc You Wanna Pork!”

if youre under 13, please for the love of god do not make an account on here. if youre under 13 and on here, please delete or stay inactive and do not log in until youre a teenager. this site is a legitimate hellhole and will suck the life out of you. if you develop the habits of people on this site, youre going to end up not having any friends because you wont know how to socialize with normal people.

if youre around 13-14 and maybe 15 if you havent had any prior experience, dont pick arguments with people on here. dont start shit. dont start drama. dont accuse people of things with no proof. that actually goes for everyone, but especially young people.

also, if youre going to argue with someone DO YOUR RESEARCH. i cannot emphasize this enough. arguing with someone when you dont know shit will get you nowhere. know what the terms youre using mean. know what youre talking about.