Praise the Sun

wish i could stockpile will to live for the long winter like cords of firewood

A corpse 👻💀☠️ should be left 🚮 well alone. Oh, I know 🤯🧠 very well 👌how the secrets 🤫 beckon 🥓 so sweetly 😋🧁🍭🍬. Only an honest death😱⚰️☠️💀 will cure 🩹🩺🌡️ you now. Liberate🗽🇺🇲 you from your wild 🤪🦍🐒🦧 curiosity 🤔💭

you buy a gaming mouse online and a mousegirl in a pizza stained t shirt comes in the mail

this is what i mean when i say the word girl itself is sexualized. the image that comes to mind with this kind of reference is a hypersexualized almost anime representation. and the joke itself comes from the objectification of women for entertainment for men, like a harem video game, or a manga where a "girl" gets delivered to your doorstep, and by girl its a hypersexualized, hyperinfantilized, hyperfeminine sex object

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Good job everyone, this one actually killed them. I'm so proud of you all.

The police have a 20 foot tall chittering homunculus that only eats children because they need it. They need it to keep us safe.

morbius plagiarised me when he said "i have increased strength and speed, and some form of bat radar" in the trailer for his movie. i say it verbatim every single time i leave the gym

i can't vibe with anyone who thinks icarus was an ignorant idiot for flying too close to the sun. "oh i'd never do that i would have remembered my father's warning and been fine". do you seriously think that after years of imprisonment, feeling the sun on your face and the open air beneath your wings, you would be able to focus on anything but the joy of being alive and free? do you actually think that if you were given the opportunity to go where nobody has never been before, you wouldn't want to push it to the limit? to dare to be the first to try what no one else has ever even thought possible? do you honestly think you're too good for your own human nature? look me in the eyes and tell me if i strapped a pair of wings to your back that could take you wherever you wanted to go whenever you pleased that you'd be careful and sensible about it. you are not better than icarus just because you have the benefit of his example.

staring into the bathroom mirror gripping the sink and telling myself "you are not uniquely horrible you are literally just some guy"