ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME (light hearted)

Andulka
d e v o n
🪼
Cosmic Funnies

Origami Around
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

★

roma★

titsay

izzy's playlists!

shark vs the universe
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

Janaina Medeiros
we're not kids anymore.
Sweet Seals For You, Always
noise dept.

#extradirty

Kiana Khansmith

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@kimataxyoku4ever
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME (light hearted)

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i promised you 🦋
(crossposting from x, bsky, & ig)
It’s their greatest invention as of yet
“i never see you at the club” ok well i never see you on ao3 at 2am reading about the same two bitches falling in love for the 1000th time in the 500th way

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French LoL account knows what’s up (x)
looper
Jayvik in a nutshell
posting your fic on AO3 like
The whole inspiration
there is no prize to perfection
just met a three month old pomeranian named horchata. her paw was the size of my fingertip. she looked like half a dandelion fluff
this just got a hockey rpf tag. due to the nature of this website
other hockey rpf enjoyers now expressing skepticism and disbelief at the choice of man referenced above and tagging it with their preferred and more horchataesque men. i love it here and i'll leave when i die

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watching sinners with an inflation calculator open in a second tab so i can understand just what kinda money the smokestack twins are throwing around. nerdiest possible movie experience i think.
Okay coming out of lurking for this because among the many great features of Sinners is you don't actually have to go outside of the movie to understand what kind of money they're throwing around. The movie tells you itself.
In the scene where Smoke teaches the young girl how to negotiate, they're standing in front of of a cafe. The shot of them negotiating is framed so that you see a sign in the cafe window advertising a Ham and Eggs breakfast - in other words, a full meal - for 25 cents. The editing makes sure to put that sign back into frame whenever the question of the value of money arises in their discussion.
Smoke offers her 10 cents a minute and asks if that works for her. She says yes. He says no, it does not and tells her to negotiate higher. The 25 cent sign is framed in the shot when he tells her no, reminding us *why* it's not a good value.
She comes back with 50 cents - which the sign has informed us is the cost of *two* meals. Smoke tells her that's too much and counters with 20, which is just under a full meal but we now know that's a fairly respectable price because we just got the high/low contrast of 10 being too little and 50 being too much.
The negotiation ends with her getting 20 cents per minute and we now know 1) 25 cents is the cost of a filling meal in this environment 2) This girl only needs to do five minutes of work to be able to feed herself for a over day (20 cents per minute times five is a dollar, which is four meals) 3) Smoke has the kind of money to throw around that over a day's worth of food for someone can be to him - as it is to our modern eyes - mere pocket change and 4) Smoke's the kind of person who can both be a violent gangster but also care about teaching this girl how to look out for herself so that one day maybe she too can throw over a day's worth of food around like pocket change.
Combined with 5) you can now use that 25 cents = a meal to do the math every other time money gets mentioned in the movie to understand just how much cash the Smoke Stack boys are dealing with.
And that's just ONE detail which, thanks to props (Hannah Beachler), editing (Michael P Shawver), and cinematography (Autumn Durald Arkapaw), told you almost everything you needed to know about how finances work in this environment. This movie is unfair to all other films in how fucking good it is.
IM TRYING TO WATCH NAKED LUNCH WHO THE HELL DID THIS
You got me good. And it's funny. But WHY
So the subtitles are still the actual Naked Lunch subtitles, leading to some very funny syncs
I'm just skipping around because this is great. william s boroughs' writing was always meant to be seen this way
The problem with having a child with an attorney that has spoken to the child like an adult since birth is that she's 4 years old and she's negotiating the order in which we're going to complete tasks as a family to best suit her idea of an ideal day.
Penny: We go home, we play the mirror game, we have dessert, we play more games, we have fun deal?
Me: Okay well actually we're going to go home, have dinner, then dessert, then we can play your video game, then tubby then bed
Penny: Okay no tubby, games first, deal?
Me: This is not - what is happening right now?
Penny: Dada?
Dada: Arbitration?
Penny: DEALS!
Every single thing in our lives has become a negotiation and it is frankly ridiculous as it is hilarious.
Penny: I want to use bare foot when we go outside
Me: I didn't know we were going outside but you have to wear shoes girl
Penny: okay but what about I use bare foot's but at Penny's house? This deal?
Me: you know what yeah fine if you agree to not fight about shoes when we leave the house you can be barefoot in the back yard, deal.
Penny: -sticks her hand out expectantly- we deal?
I think I just made a verbal contract with a 4 year old.
She's attempting to establish evidence I think
Penny: but I want to go shool pwease
Dada: okay well it is 8pm, so you have to go to sleep now
Penny: okay but I see my fwiends at shool now please, deal?
Dada: Darling no one is at school, all your friends are asleep as well.
Penny: all Penny's fwiends are sweep? What about we... get in Dadas car and check to see watch them sweep, yes deal?
Dada: I cannot begin to explain to you why that can not happen
The great thing about being beholden to Penny the Deals Warlock is that she is also beholden to the art of the deal
Me: (watching Penny scoot her step stool over to where we keep the candy jar): hey honey we're literally walking out the door to go get dinner, maybe we wait on the candy okay?
Penny: Oh but I will have some candy?
Me: Why don't you come have some mac and cheese and then when we get home you can have some candy, deal?
Penny: (running out the door) oh, yes this is deals!
We are visiting my family and Papa has quickly had to pay patronage to Penny the Deals Warlock
Papa: (yesterday morning, when Penny was a little grumpy) What about you come downstairs and we'll have some waffles and then tomorrow Papa will take you to the Diner in town for breakfast?
Penny: (extending her tiny hand to a VERY confused man) this is deal?
Papa: (not knowing hes entering a literal contract) uhm yeah deal.
-smash cut to 6:30 AM this morning-
Penny (running down the hallway in bare feet) 👹BREAKFAST DEALS👹
Penny has a canker sore to end all canker sores, to the point where she hasn't been able to eat so we had to make some deals surrounding getting some medicine on it because a hungry Penny Rose is like a angry demon queen
Me: Okay baby this is going to suck. This is going to hurt real bad for a second and then it's going to feel weird and then it's going to feel good. You're going to hate it. But if you let Mama get these three medicines in and on you [Listerine, Antacid, Tylenol] you can scream it out and then we'll go get some ice cream! Deal?
Penny: (obviously not thrilled with this idea) okay, three big shreams, three medicines, ice cream ... it will suck... ice cream ... deal. (Sticks out hand and we shake on it)
Me: okay let's do this I'm so sorry (starts the process)
Penny: ( In between her big screams ) IM GONNA GET LOTS OF FRINKLES
My husband is trying to make a deal with Penny to get upstairs and get in the bath tub
Penny: I will go upstairs and get my body clean but you hafta titch me, deal?
Dada: I would love to make this deal with you kid but I literally have no idea what you are saying- I don't know what the terms are, you're speaking a language I don't speak
Penny: you have to titch me like mama does okay DEAL!? (Sticks tiny hand out aggressively)
Dada: (looks at me bewildered for help)
Me: ( starts making a quick tick tick tick sound imitating a stop watch like I'm timing her, while penny jumps around yelling YES TITCH ME LIKE THAT)
Dada: In what world was I ever going to figure that out, thank you for acting as our legal interpreter yes deal let's go!
and off she sprints.
Penny does not want to go to bed, but man is it time for her to go to bed
Penny: But I don't want to be sleeping, I want to stay up now! I want to see Grampy and Cozy and Guppie and Papa!
Mama: What if we video call all the grands and say good night to everyone? If we do that will you then go to bed no fussing?
Penny: Oh yes, this is deals! -sticks her hand out to shake-
** we make the rounds and video call all her grandparents, they are all already in bed and say good night and penny hangs up the last video call and toddles into bed with minimal fussing **
Penny : (after a few minutes of silence, over the video monitor, to herself in her dark bedroom) I hafta respect da deals.
shout-out penny the deals warlock
put rainbow laces on all my shoes recently which is fun and sexy but has the side effect that i have gotten multiple "i like your shoelaces" from strangers and like. i cant NOT "i stole them from the president" in return. just in case. but its recieved mostly awkward laughs and looks of confusion. embarrasing myself in public out here over my damn shoelaces.
where to download every pokemon game excluding spinoffs
(plain text: where to download every pokemon game excluding spinoffs)
GAMES
pokemon red/blue
pokemon gold/silver/crystal
pokemon ruby/sapphire/emerald
pokemon firered/leafgreen
pokemon diamond/pearl/platinum
pokemon heartgold/soulsilver
pokemon black/white
pokemon black2/white2
pokemon x/pokemon y
pokemon omega ruby/alpha sapphire
pokemon sun/moon
pokemon ultra sun/ultra moon
pokemon let’s go pikachu/let’s go eevee
pokemon sword/shield
pokemon brilliant diamond/shining pearl
pokemon legends arceus
pokemon scarlet/violet
EMULATORS
gameboy
DS
3DS
switch
let me know if any of the links are dead and ill update them as soon as i can!
pokemon legends za

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I heard this metaphor growing up, and in my case, it backfired supremely, because I went out into my neighbor's backyard where a rose bush was growing, and the one I tested had like 30 petals (it was yellow, but definitely a rose of some kind), and as a very logical lass, I came to the conclusion that you could have premarital sex AT LEAST ten times before your future husband would even notice something was up. Moral of the story? Test your metaphors on the weirdest and most neurodivergent child you know before writing your weird religious propaganda.
I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave.