dipshits and dumbshits

you're just mad because im annoying you and getting on your nerves on purpose

post so nice had to reblog it twice and force it down everyone's throats

one thing I respect the hell out of is little kids lying down on the floor in public. they have had ENOUGH and are ready to go HOME and are willing to be a HUGE INCONVENIENCE about it. we can learn so much from them

still thinking about how much WORSE running errands is for kids. they aren't even your errands! sure it sucks for adults, but kids are 1) forced to tag along, 2) no personal investment in the outcome, 3) get no say on location, duration, timing. a kid stuck in a grocery store aisle while their parent gossips with an acquaintance is a Hostage Situation. at the bare minimum hostages should be allowed to lie down and get some rest

My oldest kid was especially intolerant of extra bullshit during errands. He wanted a list of where we were going, and would get irate about new ones being added to the list after we started. He called this rule “No Secret Trips,” with special contempt reserved for the bank.

i think your kid should be put in charge of a major government agency. i want him ruling the FDIC with an iron fist. i want him usurping total control over the Department Of Motor Vehicles

ultimately i just want to be an object that attract crows

"is this why you keep stealing people's gold fillings while they're asleep" no that's unrelated

why is ao3 is blocked on the hospital wifi????

It’s not even the public hospital wifi. I’m on the staff wifi. which one of you anesthesiologists was reading omega verse on the clock.

The power of having a total of 7 followers on this blog has failed me.

World Heritage Post

it's always funny to me when ppl act like it's somehow incestuous for characters who consider each other found family/chosen family/whatever u wanna call the trope to date each other, and it's funny for many reasons, but most specifically it's funny because irl when you meet a person and get really attached and decide that you want to be family with them, there's a very popular legally recognized way of doing that & it's called marriage

Marriage promotes incest because then you end up having sex with a family member

yall aren’t gonna believe this

I’M RIGHT BEHIND YOU

Thank you Evil Wizard, it’s good to know someone has our backs

IN A SCARY WAY

Thank you Evil Wizard, finally someone to scare away the creeps!

I FEEL LIKE WE NEED TO WORK ON OUR COMMUNICATION

I need to see how this reblog thing works, can some of u reblog and talk within those separate reblogs?

the older i get, the more i appreciate the competency and cooperativeness of those politicians who got together to kill caesar 

60 agreed to kill him and only 23 followed through with the plan, if I remember correctly.

i’m american do you know how siked i would be to get 23 senators to agree on direct action 

According to Christopher Andrew apparently only one stroke was actually fatal

that is exactly as effective as I expect most political action to be tbh

I think it’s my duty to tell the world that not only a single stab was fatal, but also a bunch of those senators accidentally stabbed each other (and some of them died because of the wounds) cause they were panicking so much while attacking Caesar

this is it. this is the taxpayers money in action. incredible.

I like when fic length/book length/movie length is its own punchline

Found an insane baby picture