Trashcendental

World's Most Precious Creature.

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

Crazy how many people want characters in fiction to speak and act like they’ve had 20 hours of intensive therapy. Could NOT be me I want these bitches fucked up insane

i think the joker should start talking like this for real. no other character should do this only the joker. i want batman to have to deal with this

having a cat is great. there's a small little animal wandering around. effervescent

EATING MY CHARGER

Only usamericans will find out that racism exists in other countries and then proceed to victimize themselves of the racism in these countries that theyve never been to

does anyone know how to get what you want when you're the type of person who avoids everything

Anything that reminds me of anything makes me wanna throw up

having a headache while hydrated is so unfair. you were supposed to protect me.

i kinda get it when dogs let out those big fucking sighs randomly. you gotta try it its very nice. just a big ole sigh.

as funny as “those are his hooves you bitch” I’m mad that it overshadows that lil wayne really did have socks on in a jacuzzi 

can y'all stop just throwing random words together and expecting us to understand it

you had to be there

Nobody has ever been capable of writing a scathingly harsh and well formulated satire about the perils of modern capitalism, that doesn't just get immediately one-upped by some random food service worker talking about their actual week.

daughter (non-practicing)

sister (deadbeat)