Corbeau Is So Babygirl

FUCK YOU, LUMIOSE!!! If you're dumb enough to take out a loan this weekend, you're a big enough schmuck to come to RUST SYNDICATE! Bad deals! Threats that make you break down! Yakuza! If you think you're going to pay off your debt to Rust Syndicate, you can KISS MY ASS! It's our belief that you're such a stupid motherfucker, you'll fall for this bullshit, GUARANTEED! If you find a better deal, SHOVE IT UP YOUR UGLY ASS! You heard us right, SHOVE IT UP YOUR UGLY ASS! Bring your starters! Bring your Megas! Bring your legendaries! WE'LL POISON THEM! That's right, WE'LL POISON YOUR POKÉMON! Because at Rust Syndicate, you're fucked six ways from Sunday! Take a hike, to Rust Syndicate: home of CHALLENGE CLIMBING! That's right, CHALLENGE CLIMBING! How does it work? If you can climb a human ladder seven stories straight up and not fall off, you get to keep your kneecaps! Don't wait! Don't delay! DON'T FUCK WITH US, or we'll rip your Key Stones off! Only at Rust Syndicate, the only lender that tells you to FUCK OFF! HURRY UP, ASSHOLE! This event ends the minute after you sign the contract, and you better not go back on our terms or you're a dead motherfucker! GO TO HELL! Rust Syndicate! Lumiose City's filthiest and exclusive home of the meanest sons of bitches in the region of Kalos, GUARANTEED!!!