whatever i was gonna say can't possibly be funnier than the mere existence of this draft
RMH
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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@junoper
whatever i was gonna say can't possibly be funnier than the mere existence of this draft

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Sometimes there are memes that are so important to the culture of this site that you would swear they started in 2014 or something but you look it up and its like
like father like daughter
soliloquy by an immortal cave painter.
pencil, ink, and ochre on paper
Anyone who's ever done anything creative needs to fucking see this.

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pink moon.
I feel like this is the kind of thing you only reblog if you have an aesthetic blog, which I do not, but goddammit I just love it when the moon lines up with stuff
dandelion sun~
im gonna make it big someday just you watch
*goes back to jerkin it*
waaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitt
Human Is is a 1955 Philip K. Dick sci-fi short story where a guy goes to another planet for work and when he comes back to Earth his personality has flipped from an asshole to a sweet, kind, considerate man. Everyone's immediately convinced that an alien has taken over his body, this goes all the way to court, and in court his wife testifies that she's noticed no changes at all and so the charges are dropped.
And then there's a bit right at the end of the story as the wife and the husband are walking out of court:
Jill turned abruptly. "What is your name? Your real name."
The man's gray eyes flickered. He smiled a little, kind, gentle smile. "I'm afraid you would not be able to pronounce it. The sounds cannot be formed..."
Jill was silent as they walked along, deep in thought. The city lights were coming on all around them. Bright yellow spots in the gloom. "What are you thinking?" the man asked.
"I was thinking perhaps I will still call you Lester," Jill said. "If you don't mind."
"I don't mind," the man said. He put his arm around her, drawing her close to him. He gazed down tenderly as they walked through the thickening darkness, between the yellow candles of light that marked the way. "Anything you wish. Whatever will make you happy."
And I. God. There's something there. A soupcon of monsterfuckery. To tell your partner in a moment of intimacy that yes, you're something so inhuman that the lips you're stealing can't speak your actual name. You're a parasite that not only had the ability to burrow under this man's skin and take over his life, but you were so desperate to escape a dead, dry, blasted planet that you did.
And for your partner to then turn around and go "I know, I've always known, and I love you" is just. God I know it's not a great Dick story but something about it is making me lose my mind
How long do I want the IceWings' snouts and horns to be? Yes.

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goodnight sweet prince
Finding out this was in Tucson by going to the rink on a whim felt like seeing a celebrity.
Orgasm denial. Orgasm anger. Orgasm bargaining. Orgasm depression. Orgasm acceptance.
Kind of fucked thinking about the fact that there is one single American legally authorized to research the critically endangered pygmy raccoon in Mexico and it is, in fact, the same person who did Dashcon.
This person is also this person
And is currently the only person from the United States legally permitted to research the critically endangered pygmy raccoons (Procyon pygmaeus) in Cozumel, Mexico.
For reference, this is me, BTW! I was 15 when I started Dashcon and 17 when it actually happens, and now study tourism’s impact on the critically endangered pygmy raccoon. I’ve been researching them before now, but due to Mexico’s laws, I’ve only been allowed to do data collection from abroad (so think surveys to tourists and video analysis on social media.) But now I’m authorized for in situ research!! Yippee! I even got a grant through my university as well to fund the whole project 🥺
This is the reason this hellsite is truly a homesite. We grow here. You can go back and see how it happened. I was a Bachelor’s student when I started my tumblr. Now I’m an Associate Professor and Curator, with my own lab and Denmark’s national collection of 70,000ish reptile and amphibian specimens in my care.
COME ONNN

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sorry to everyone out there who thinks they have the funniest tshirt but i think i can confidently say i just saw the actual funniest tshirt just now. i passed by a beautiful black woman with long multicolor braids blowing majestically in the beach breeze & she was wearing an oversized tshirt that said in gigantic letters "WHITE BOY OF THE YEAR"
i’m not even that much of a pervert i can just find the eroticism in anything. doesn’t get me bricked up necessarily i just like to appreciate it.