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#star trek #spock #eyesore #tell me in the comments how much you love mr spock

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liquidstar

I remember this one time I went on a carnival ride with my brothers, and I was anxious the whole time. So they were dogging on me obviously, because that's what we always do. We make fun of each other until one of us snaps back, and that's the bit y'know? But I was Not in the right mood for it, so I was just like "guys if I die I want you to know I forgive you." And they were like "Dude.... Why did you say that? Ok it's not funny anymore. Now we just feel bad." 💀 Ok sorry.

liquidstar

When my brothers and I were little, there was a tiny playground across our house, and at one point there was a wasp's nest right next to it. I remembered messing around and getting stung, but not the whole context. I brought it up with my mom and apparently this was the order of events:

My little brother got stung first because he was sitting too close. He comes home crying, and me and our other brother are like "those wasps STUNG our brother? We have to avenge him." So we get dressed up as warriors and bring plastic swords with us to the playground. Our mom warns us not to mess with the wasp's nest and we're like "we won't!"

So we leave and immediately start messing with the wasp's nest. It's down low, so after thwacking it we put rocks in the way of the entrance, and the wasps start to freak out. Of course we got stung and came home crying.

Our dad gets home around the same time, and our mom explains what happened. Instead of lecturing us on why you shouldn't mess with wasp's nests, he's like "those wasps STUNG my kids? I have to avenge them."

So he grabs a caulk gun and goes to leave, and our mom is like "PLEASE don't mess with the wasp's nest" and he's like "I won't."

5 mins later he comes back and is like "I got stung."

going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi

I don't need the chatgpt random algorithm to write emails for me because I already have a custom and 100% flawless algorithm called "writing the exact same three emails with the names changed"

going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi

#1: "hi [landlord], hope you're doing well! [apartment thing] is [broken/a problem]. we need it [fixed/replaced/handled] by [date]. let us know when you'll send someone over so we can be here to let them in. thanks so much, [op]"

#2: "hi [professor], hope you're doing well! unfortunately, I'm [sick/stuck at work/dead] and won't be able to submit [assignment] by [due date]. could I please have an extension? if not, is there anything else I could do to make up this credit? thanks so much, [op]"

#3: "hi [customer service person], hope you're doing well! unfortunately, [product] [didn't arrive/is broken/wrong color/gave me a rash/poisoned my crops] and I'd like to receive a [refund/replacement]. here is the documentation of the order and photos of [broken thing/wrong thing/my rash/dead crops]. thanks so much, [op]"

going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi

"but op I work in an office I have to write way more emails than you" well that's your fault for working in an office i got nothing to do with that

perpetualsarcasmmachine

Writing an email is so easy and I will tell you how it's done. This is the advice is for everyone with an email job, but you can apply it to normal human interaction.

The FIRST SENTENCE is the thing you want the recipient to do. Do not make them guess.

I want to let you know about ... (This email is to inform someone of something not to ask them to do anything)

Could you please do ... (This is a request. You want them to do something).

I'm looking into x and wondering if you can help me (this is also a request but for information instead of an action).

People do not want to read an email and even if they do read it, most people are skimming and not interested. Tell them what you want first, then provide context or other information (when you need a thing is often key). If the email is informational, you can even add "you don't need to do anything, this is just to keep you informed!" People will appreciate not having to figure out what you want from them.

If you can't articulate what you want the recipient to do with the message, you are not ready to email them. I read too many emails where I have no idea what the person wants from me.

Put the most important thing first and everyone will be impressed! AI cannot do this for you because it can't tell what's important! Only you know that, which is why you must write your own emails.

going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi

to everyone who wants help with emails: go through the notes of this post. there are ideas I've never thought of and plenty of scripts for all kinds of situations/jobs

#I will say I am a slut for a productive email #that said many are trash and actively dealing psychic damage to my frontal lobe #but a clear concise email with the correct people included? yummmmm #do! not! make! me! guess! anything!!!! write it out especially if it's the first email in a chain

aceynk

ants carry crumb for no reason

spider web is made for no reason

worm tunnel for no reason

flies near poop for no reason

we love these pointless animal

whimsicalbirde

No, they gotta eat. That is the point of all these. Crumb is ant food. Web provide food, like job provide money. worm eat dirt. Flies are weird.

aceynk

i just asked every scientist and they all said that you arent true here and thats not correct. i dont tolerate disinformations on my page. they do these things for no reason, and thats fine. we love all of them anyways because they are beautiful in their own yucky & terriblw way

whimsicalbirde

So flies aren't weird?

aceynk

theyre worthless animals which is lovely

ospreyonthemoon

the crumbs aren't actually ant food anyway! the ants gather crumbs to feed their domesticated fungus. they have farms. they eat the fungus and bring organic matter for the fungus to eat. and theyre not terrible they're lovely.

suddenlysentient

(getting REALLY mad) NOOOOOOO!!! THAT'S ONLY LEAFCUTTER ANTS!!!!!! ONLY LEAFCUTTER ANTS DO THAT!!!!!!!! AND THEIR FUNGUS ONLY EATS LEEAAVES!!!!!

vixen-flame

Is it strange that I hate OP's post? It's like, strangely anti intellectual and really mean to bugs in a way that seems positive but without any of the substance 😢. Did you ever think of the bug's feelings Aceynk?

aceynk

these animals are useless and stupid and and thats awesome

#smooth sharks

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escuerzoresucitado

a-most-beloved-fool

I love star trek because fans will be like "FUCK he's literally the cutest EVER 🥺🥺💕💕" and then they're talking about this guy

and then you watch star trek, and you're like

damn.

they're right.

he is literally the cutest ever.

#we love rom #star trek

postarcadian

the thing I love most about how tumblr users use tags is that it’s like what if a social media website had a footnotes system

men-iss-vess-ull-deactivated202

when the ogre I hired to guard the castle complains that the longsword I gave him requires a level of control and finesse he isn't used to

horribly-precise-transcriptions

audio: [so‿ɡ̊o ˈbæʔ t̯ʊ̆‿ðᵊ ˌǁ͜klə̃ː˧˨ə́b̚]

clottedwings

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mcschnuggles

baynton

bookhobbit

The first rule of sewing is you can fix anything if you have patience, creativity, and a little bit of extra fabric! The second rule of sewing is AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

langernameohnebedeutung

Schism? Schism today?

langernameohnebedeutung

🍿

turuin

Wow, I didn't have "catholic schism" on my 2026 bingo card

mygogglesdosomething

Schism today

#HAHAHAHAHA WHAT

fleshdyke

the funniest thing abt hannibal fans on this site is the way ppl will post screenshots from the show and be like "HIS SLIME 😍😍😍" and the picture is mads mikkelsen looking like this

fleshdyke

that is supposed to say smile.

tyote

#he's doing his best ok #db

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redstonedust

hate when drug stores organise makeup by brand i dont give a shit if its maybelline or elf or nyx or fuckdamn mr beast brand skin toxins for all i care. put all the eyeshadow in one place and dont waste my time.

kailysander

Queer Mexicana 🇲🇽

kailysander

Hey this post is not for terfs btw. The umbrella term “queer” is used here on purpose.

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