You gotta bolt when you see the gates are down

[doesn't understand jacking off] and I'm supposed to... touch my penis? [shaking my head and smiling, murmuring to myself] touching my own penis... [chuckles] what will they come up with next

*dirty talking* you’ve been a very bad boy and im just going to straight up kill you now

ok computer show me men in pain

living under a rock is so fun i love watching a movie that’s been famous for decades and being like wow this is so good.. did you guys know about this

(I would like to emphasize the “non-judgemental” portion of the caption)

work tomorrow is one of the worst things that can happen to you

i am always one wrong word away from being shot by all the people who find me tolerable

I do like that given the opportunity to specify, you did choose to kill op

I assumed that's what op intended

thank you for coming to my this

#mythis

why do men have this eternal fear of being used for money they don’t have lol