Officially Left

i had a 4 hour drive today so i put on the revenge of the sith audiobook and the part where palpatine tells anakin to kill dooku came on right around the time that i saw a cybertruck and for a brief and beautiful moment when he said "do it" i had the urge to ram my honda full on into that shitty ass car

everyone who says that anakin’s fall in that movie was too sudden has never been so angry at an Elon dickrider trying to cut in front of you at a traffic standstill while a droning, pleasant British voice tells you that murder is okay and necessary. I’m sorry guys but I would have folded too

happy 125th birthday to bunny roger

(he did not precisely invent capri pants- Sonja de Lennart did, and they popularized them together)

i'm gonna be honest with you all i straight-up did not notice that the E in this picture was fucked up. i don't know what's going on here and i'm scared

americans are a saudi oil baron's idea of classy. brits are an american's idea of classy. the french are a brit's idea of classy. unfortunately the chain ends here since the french's idea of classy is also the french

Crucially: this is not because the french are actually classy

Attempting to locate a new Greek restaraunt using my gyroscope

theres ALWAYS a relevant XKCD for everything huh

This ancient Rockabilly pendant holds tremendous power

@elvis-official

Woah mama I am eternal, I am before time itself

went to a new optometrist today wearing my squid facts ‘save our freaks’ shirt from @sarahmackattack that has a strawberry squid on it. and i wasn’t even thinking about it but the optometrist walked in and he was like ‘oh what does your shirt say’ so i showed him and he was like ‘oh that’s neat!’ and then i thought he might like to know about strawberry squid eyes since they have weird eyes and he is an optometrist and all. so i was like ‘yeah it’s actually a real kind of squid called a strawberry squid, their eyes are really cool because they have one big yellow-green one and one small blue one’ and he kind of gasped and went ‘oh my god that’s so interesting i wonder why they have that. do you know what their retina composition is like?’ and i watched as he minimized my chart on the computer and started looking up images of strawberry squid and then he googled ‘strawberry squid retina composition’ and he was like ‘sorry we’ll get to your eye exam in a moment i just really want to find out’ LMAO 10/10 optometrist experience will be returning

Hell yeah

The corollary is the some emails should be meetings. Because I read your email that you sent to four dozen people and we all have questions.

save me, rice mixed with some bullshit

WAIT did I never tell tumblr about the haunted space waterpark hotel

I should add that I did not see a single other guest the entire time I was there, which intensified the whole vibe.

There is at least one thing to do in kansas

there is only one reason to go to kansas

I see we're learning about the flaming hot cheeto earthquake proof sarcophagus again