get your shit together loverboy

if you enjoyed this poem & would like to read the rest of grit, you can for free in PDF format right here (hosted by transreads.org, uploaded by the author)

Hot take but praise is a good tool for encouraging healthy behavior. Positive reinforcement is good. Relying exclusively on punishment to change people's behavior is both cruel and ineffective. If someone does better than they did yesterday, let them know you appreciate it, let them know that they're improving!

For a city to be walkable. It must also be sittable.

Give us recommendations for artists I can get little presents for my wife from. Please. I legitimately want as many artists in the pool as possible.

@nerdykeppie

listen to me!!! you're not meant to look "hot" while eating pussy. you're not meant to be neat or tidy or fucking sexy - that's not the goal. you're supposed to fucking get in there and descend like a creature awakened from a deep slumber. you should come up covered like one of those fucking triple dipped apple fritters. you should be like robin williams in Jumanji all discombobulated going "what year is it." get lost in the fucking sauce!!!! be uninhibited!!! ENJOY!!!!!

this is like basic foundational misogyny 101 but the fact that it's almost unconsciously ingrained to consider trousers a more "practical" alternative to skirts across the majority of human cultures does make me feel a little kicked in the head. this isn't even anything against pants, or denying that sometimes they are the best suited garment for purpose, it's just that skirts are nearly always unfairly compared as the a frivolous option, even though they're functionally not dissimilar at all. they're comfortable, capable of being tailored to suit a variety of purposes both aesthetic and functional, and simply what some people prefer. and yet, because they're so strongly tied to women and femininity, they're derided. a long skirt is an impediment; shortening a skirt is a sexual act. throughout history humans of all demographics have worn skirts and skirt-like clothing for a variety of purposes, but to wear a skirt in our enlightened modern age is a heavily gendered and politically loaded notion. and we just tolerate living like this. fucking unreal.

the other thing about Internet dogpiling is that it is just not possible to think clearly during the acute stages. it’s so easy to criticize people for responding defensively or tactlessly to mass criticism but I cannot overstate the degree to which your brain becomes a rat in a trap. I think we do have to temporarily recalibrate our expectations in these circumstances and accept that they do not necessarily represent how that person responds to criticism. the skills for self-regulating and reacting to normal interpersonal criticism are not the same skills needed to respond to viral callouts.

Im always like "i will not add my two cents. i will not add my two cents" but i cant lie the pennies are getting sweaty in my hand

complaining works never 👏 stop 👏 whining 👏

I'm simultaneously tired of this grandpa and aware that thats too dang bad