This night is winding down, but time means nothing

Please have a moment of silence for the people who were killed instead of freed when news of emancipation finally reached the furthest corners of the american south.

have another moment for the ledgers, catalogs, and records that were burned and the homes that were destroyed to hide the presence of very much alive and still enslaved people on dozens of plantations and homesteads across the south for decades after emancipation.

and have a third moment for those who were hunted and killed while fleeing the south to find safety across the border, overseas, in the north and to the west.

black people. light a candle, write a note to those who have passed telling them what you have achieved in spite of the racist and intolerant conditions of this world, feel the warmth of the flame under your hand, say a prayer of rememberance if you are religious, place the note under the candle, and then blow it out.

if you have children, sit them down and tell them anything you know about the life of oldest black person you've ever met. it doesn't have to be your own family. tell them what you know about what life was like for us in the days, years, decades after emancipation. if you don't know much, look it up and learn about it together.

This is Juneteenth.

I was tired of being perceived as a woman. My goal was to be visibly trans.

My identity is still something that I don’t have a perfect definition for. When asked, I often tell people I’m transmasculine and nonbinary. I know I’m okay with they/them and he/him pronouns, but I’ve never fully connected with any specific label. The one label that feels right is “trans.” So, that’s how I want to be perceived.

This realization brought some complications with it. I imagined how different going out in public might be once I was visibly trans. I worried about my safety. I asked myself, Is it worth trading my cis-appearing privileges to feel comfortable in my body? After some thought, I decided the answer was “yes.”

Throughout the six years I spent thinking about medical transition, I often felt like I was standing still. 

It was frustrating to keep going back and forth about whether to start testosterone. Really, I was making slow progress towards finding my goal.

Since so many official resources seemed tailored for binary people, I turned to my trans support group, online forums, and friends. It turns out, a lot of nonbinary people have the same concerns. Many nonbinary people who pursue testosterone have a fear of losing their hair or changing too drastically. A lot of people worry about being visibly transgender in public. Everyone seems to have a different way of dealing with these concerns.

No two trans people have the exact same journey. So, every transition has to have a personal definition, which I felt like I needed to open up a conversation about medical transition with a doctor.

Even with a clear definition, I wasn’t one hundred percent sure. Without that complete certainty, I feared being turned away by doctors. To attempt to reach one hundred percent, I made a very detailed chart. Everyone understands gender and hormones differently. No one chart, questionnaire, or other method can help all trans people discover their approach. Some people might click with journaling, while others might want a Venn diagram."

these are images from a 1930s pamphlet that endorsed kudzu, entitled "stop gullies: save your farm"

WHY is the fucking AIR out here TOUCHING ME

like the first signs of a flare up from stress/over exertion used to be red face + fever + rash on my hands

but the lines of my tattoo will become raised and then a little itchy before it progresses to that point

and im discovering that, yeah, if i just listen to the wizard and rest/recuperate/stop pushing myself when it starts acting weird, i can sometimes avoid triggering the other symptoms

A lot of the vets I've worked with have not brought up cat weights until they are very much obese because a lot of owners are like "my cat isn't fat he's big boned!" so they don't bother much beyond "Please don't let him/her gain more weight than this"

I did say "average" which is not the same as "all". These weights are from 10 years at a cat only hospital and nearly 10 years at a shelter.

Yes, being overweight is actually quite bad for cats resulting in early arthritis and significantly increasing their risks of diabetes.

Mallorn, before I put him on a diet. How many people would honestly be able to say this cat was actually overweight and needed to lose 4 pounds? Not many.

And to show how hard weight gain and loss can be to determine on a long haired cat

13 pounds Tumbleweed

~ 11 pound tumbleweed.

His initial weight gain was 30% of his ideal (10#). 11 pounds is a 15% total loss from 13 pounds, and 20% of his ideal weight.

Those are significant amounts. Imagine gaining 30% of your current body weight. Imagine losing 15% of your current body weight.

You can't tell just by looking.