i bet mandy just loves sending mickey and ian really lame couple shit (like matching pjs) as she knows mickey fucking hates it (which amuses her and ian) and ian fucking loves it (as he likes matching with mickey as heās a possessive cheesy mf)
omg i love this so much i did a thing.
The package arrived two days before Christmas. It was heavy, and Ian had eyed it suspiciously ever since Mickey dragged it through the front door of their apartment, complaining about the stairs and the postage cost.
"What is that?" Ian asked, looking up from their small kitchen table.
Mickey grunted, tearing at the tape with his teeth. "Mandy. Said she was sending āessentials for the happy couple.ā I think sheās trying to piss me off."
He got the box open. And then his entire face went rigid.
Ian leaned over. "Essentials, huh?" He peered inside, and his entire face split into a slow, mischievous grin.
Inside were two matching, full-body festive onesie pajamas. They were bright red, covered in cartoon reindeers that were clearly doing something inappropriate, and had a back flap.
"I am not wearing that," Mickey said, his voice deadly serious as he backed away toward the couch. "I am not turning our apartment into some Hallmark channel bullshit."
Ian didnāt say anything. He just reached in, pulled one out, and held it up against himself. It was exactly the kind of ridiculously soft, lame couple stuff he secretly loved.
Mickey saw the look in his eyes. "Donāt you dare," he warned. "I will sleep outside in the dirt before I put that on my body.ā
Ten minutes later, Mandyās phone buzzed.
It was a mirror selfie from their bathroom. Ian was in his full reindeer onesie, beaming proudly with his arm hooked around Mickey, who was also, very reluctantly, wearing his. Mickeyās expression looked like he was plotting a triple murder.
Underneath, Ian had texted: You have single-handedly ruined his week. I love you so much. Thank you.
