Ire Reblogs

we are gonna be vacuuming up this post for the next five years

@sexy-people-contests-2026 the cup’s point of view as you poured in glitter

At least I cleaned off all the glitter afterwards

It's nice that loud noises don't stick to clothes like smells do. That would be really bad if they did.

@joy-and-whimsy-official

Joy and whimsy detected! This post is joyful and whimsical!

You know that thing would eat you if you died, right? *pointing to the false image of you that others perceive*

bunnies = buggies because of their crawling

here’s to all the weird little girls growing up into even weirder men

and the weird little whatevers that grew up into weirder whatevers

once you realize you don’t actually need to sleep, you can really (stops talking abruptly and stares straight ahead for 4 minutes)

There’s an organization called Advance Peace in Fresno CA that combats gun violence by providing mentoring and social services to people likely to commit gun violence that has singlehandedly reduced our local violent crime rate and recently the federal funding for it has been denied for some reason and surprise surprise the violent crime rate is going back up OH WHO COULD HAVE PREDICTED THIS

blue-haired liberal sounds like the name of a delicate endangered species of bird