absolutely criminal how falling into bad habits is the easiest thing in the world while developing positive habits feels like fighting a literal war
Noah Kahan
Today's Document
Monterey Bay Aquarium
hello vonnie
d e v o n
Fai_Ryy
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

★
Misplaced Lens Cap
Not today Justin

roma★
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
One Nice Bug Per Day
Game of Thrones Daily
h
YOU ARE THE REASON

bliss lane

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
sheepfilms
Show & Tell

seen from Spain

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@ineedthisname
absolutely criminal how falling into bad habits is the easiest thing in the world while developing positive habits feels like fighting a literal war

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Last survivor of an extinct alien civilisation who regards this as a personal victory.
Last survivor of an extinct alien civilisation who's just as surprised as you are.
Last survivor of an extinct alien civilisation who's mad about being left out.
Last survivor of an extinct alien civilisation who tells a different story about how it happened each time they're asked.
Last survivor of an extinct alien civilisation who, in their unguarded moments, admits it's probably for the best.
Last survivor of an extinct alien civilisation who claims the others are "just resting".
Last survivor of an extinct alien civilisation who insists it's not their fault.
Doctor Who
It’s weird how there are some American crops that I think of as wholly integrated into the world such that I occasionally (ungratefully) forget they’re American (potatoes, tomatoes, hot peppers). But then there are other American crops where I’m lightly surprised the rest of the world grows them or is even into them (sunflowers, maize/corn, peanuts).
The real point of this post being that, while obviously I’m kinda stupid, those indigenous American agricultural bioengineers were fucking geniuses. Endless series of absolute culinary bangers. We owe them everything.
That moment when I, as a Bulgarian, realized that tomatoes, potatoes, peppers, sunflower (oil) and corn are in fact not native to my country and were imported from the Americas. I remember that day. My heart shattered. Oh, and the irony of our nationalists accusing Turkey of "stealing our cuisine". My brother in Boiko, when did Europeans discover America and what empire were we under during that year and would continue to be under it for 4 more centuries?
I'm just imagining Italians seeing a tomato for the first time, they gently put olives away, tenderly grasp the Tomato and whisper to it with love
"You are my new best friend." Same happening with Poles and potatoes XD
And much of Asia responding similarly to peppers. I think the peppers loved Asia back just as much. A true love story.
#wait potatoes are native to America???? i thought they were Irish????
@disasterpenguin
Nope! Not Irish. The potato just produces a lot of calories per square foot of soil for growing it. So it was a big hit. (Note that it’s not more nutritious than bread, it just takes less land and labour than bread.)
Other things from the Americas:
Cocoa and chocolate
Beans (except soybeans, fava beans, chickpeas, mung beans, lentils, and peas)
Squash (except inedible Eurasian gourds)
Avocados
Sweet potatoes
Vanilla
Tobacco
Pineapple
Cassava/manioc
And some American critters:
Chipmunks
Raccoons 🦝
Hummingbirds
Skunks
Turkeys
Guinea pigs
Llamas, alpacas, vicuñas, etc.
Turkeys
On the flip side, things that are not native to the Americas include:
Rice
Horses, donkeys, mules
Cattle (so also dairy), pigs, sheep, and domesticated goats
Chickens
Large dogs
Cats
Rats
Earthworms
Pigeons, house sparrows, starlings
Wheat
Onions and garlic
Citrus
Bananas
Honey
Sugar
People always forget that every horse in the Americas came from Eurasia. Which may come from some idea that indigenous people in the Americas were… static, unchanging cultures? As opposed to the reality, which is tribes like the Lakota taking one look at these weird new animals and going “oh hell yeah” and doing horses so good it would make Genghis Khan shed tears of awe
the upside of ADHD is that it makes you a fucking genius
the downside is that you don't get to decide when and for how long you're a genius.
Or what you are going to be a genius about.
You have a big work project?
Nah. You're now a genius at making boardgames. For 7 hours.
My spouse and I were talking last night and the jeans problem came up so I want to talk about it with tumblr here.
The jeans problem was the favorite lecture one of my philosophy professors in college gave about the history of jeans and how it ties into capitalism/mainstream culture absorbing and monetizing any counterculture it encounters. So prior to the 1950s jeans were mostly an item of work-wear that you wore on the job as a farmer or factory worker or miner because they were cheap, durable, and hard-wearing. If you were off the job you'd wear what we'd call now dress pants or slacks. This changes in the 1950s when youth culture start wearing jeans as regular clothing, again because they're cheap, durable, and hard-wearing. But then jeans get absorbed by the culture and we start getting designer jeans, acid-washed jeans, pre-ripped jeans, and now we got people shelling out hundreds of dollars for "povertycore" aesthetic. And now jeans aren't even cheap, durable, and hard-wearing.
This came up because my spouse was talking about thrifting and spooky things (two of her favorite things) and how there was this trend of buying a landscape painting from a thrift store which was probably going to end up in a garbage dump and painting a sheet ghost on it to make it art millennials would like. But now you can go to Michael's or Home Goods or wherever and just buy a landscape painting with a sheet ghost on it, mass-manufactured by a corporation. The counter-culture once again being monetized and absorbed by the culture. It's the jeans problem again.

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Soccer players are the horses of sports. They run around in fields for hours on end. They stub their toe and they die. They fall and they die. They run into each other and
labyrinth! please zoom in on this or i'll get turned into a goblin
oh also!! happy 40th anniversary to this film because Holy Shit
"This is not how you make cookies!"
This is like one of those fake cooking/baking videos where they clearly swapped the item out at a certain step to make it look like the terrible recipe worked... except the guy baking them is just as in the dark about how and when the switcheroo happened as the audience is.
xena gave us trans drag lesbianism as a treat
There are layers to this. Earlier in the episode, Xena discovers her secret while they're sharing a locker room. A woman she has got naked with turned out to be trans. It's the exact scenario terfs are always fear-mongering about, but Xena just shrugs it off.
Also, the kiss was a big deal not just because it was gay but because the trans actress was HIV positive. They wanted to show the world that you can't contract HIV just from kissing someone. Bear in mind, the AIDS crisis was still fresh on people's minds in the 90s.
Happy Pride.
i read this to adam and he just yelled, outraged, "THEYRE BABIES"
TRUE HATERS, SINCE DAY 1 THEY HAVENT BEEN GIVING THEM A FUCKING INCH
this is next level
20 years later. you're kermit. opening night at the muppet theater. you look up. you can't believe it. those two awful cunts from next door are here. neither of them died yet. they're going to be here, forever.
They're immortal.
They were heckling the actors in Ford's theater on the day Lincoln was shot.
They heckled the first reading of the Epic of Gilgamesh.
They heckled the first lifeform to crawl onto land.
They heckled the big bang.
"They say that time exists now."
"I can tell."
"How so?"
"Because this show is a waste of it!"
"DOHOHOHOHOHO!"

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Imagine for a second that you're an interstellar microorganism. I'm not doing that.
Project Hail Mary (2026) dir. Phil Lord & Chris Miller
I do think that Shane gets a Russian language tutor. He sees that Ilya is always having to think, speak, and translate in his second language. And he knows that Ilya is fluent by this point, but if he's serious about forever with Ilya (which he is) he wants Ilya to be able to communicate with his boyfriend in his native language. He also saw how much his grandparents struggled with learning English as adults and how much more expressive and talkative they were when they spoke Japanese at home together.
So he gets a tutor. He meticulously researches her (she's from Moscow, so he'll learn from someone with Ilya's same accent). She's signed to more NDAs than he can count. She has 10 years of experience, she's certified to teach English and Russian, and she has 4.8 stars on MyTutor.
Shane pays her a frankly concerning amount of money to make house calls. Twice weekly, unless he's on the road, she arrives at his apartment to teach him foundational Russian. She gives him workbooks, Russia cartoon recommendation, podcasts for beginners, etc. He tells her he's learning because his boyfriend is Russian and she outlines a course that focuses on domestic language first (as opposed to travel or business). She even teaches him what she calls a 'culture course' with lessons on Russian music, food, and various traditions.
She's only a few years older than Shane and he actually finds himself looking forward to her visits. At this point, she's the only person other than his parents that knows he has a boyfriend.
About 4 months in, Shane finally feels comfortable enough to ask about what he'd been very excited about learning.
"You want me to teach you how to talk dirty to your boyfriend?" Ekaterina raised an eyebrow.
"Um," Shane blushed. Was this a little too far? Was this inappropriate to ask of a tutor? "Yes? If - If that's okay, I mean."
A slow smirk spread over her face. "This will be fun. Fun for me, now. Fun for you, later."
"I made a list," Shane admitted. He wasn't going to back out now, he put a lot of thought into his list. He turned to it in his Russian notebook and handed it to her.
She scanned over it indifferently. "You will use all this in one night?"
"Yeah, probably. Is it too much?"
"It is good you have a Russian man," Ekaterina said. "They have good stamina. Mostly, anyway."
And while it was a little embarrassing for Ekaterina to correct his pronunciation of please let me suck your cock, it helped that she seemed just as comfortable with that as there is tea on the stove.
Though, maybe he shouldn't have learned those phrases at the same time, because Ilya will never, for as long as they live, allow him to forget asking, while down on his knees and with excellent pronunciation, please let me suck your tea.
This isn't the whole picture, but it's part of it. He's also making sure that the amount of money he and his immediate supporters get is maximized in preparation for the second part, the part where he made his first fortune: buying everything up when the markets tank and the prices plummet, esp. on property.
Do I actually want to write this fanfic or do I just want to wallow in the delicious daydream like a pig in the mud?
Unfortunately I wish for others to wallow in my magnificent mud pit
thank you for the magnificent mud pits, fanfic writers
Trace amounts of Monica in my life
A statistically insignificant level of Monica in my life
My life manufactured in a facility that also processes Monica
Too funny to leave in comments @inkskinned

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Considering the possibility of Holmes being related to the Addams Family, probably on Morticia's side for the Frenchness
Primarily based on these images
But also because I want Holmes and Morticia to speak French, and for him to fence with Gomez, and teach the kids about poisons and criminals
(The family all adore Watson and find him absolutely fascinating, of course)
“Here’s a letter for you, old man,” I announced as I sifted through the morning post one grey day in October. “Not a lot else, I’m afraid.”
Holmes folded down the top of the newspaper he was reading so he could see me. “A letter from whom?”
“Not sure.” I turned it over to study it as best I could. The envelope was thick and expensive, postmarked from America. The ink was rich and black, and it smelled unexpectedly floral, with an odd sulphuric note underneath. “Looks to be a woman’s writing, I’d say.”
“If you would.” He held out a pale hand. I passed him the envelope and he neatly sliced it open with his pocket knife. A single page slipped out onto his breakfast plate. He unfolded it with a flick of his wrist, then smiled. “Ah! Morticia.”
“Morticia?”
“Addams. She is my second cousin.”
I was immediately intrigued, for Holmes so rarely talked about his relatives. It had taken several years after our meeting for him to bring up the subject of his elder brother, who lived and worked barely an hour’s walk away. I wasn’t surprised that a second cousin in America had gone unnoted until now.
“Unusual names run in the family, I see.”
Holmes smirked. “Her grandmother was my great-aunt Séraphine, who met and married a quite singular gentleman named Algernon Frump while travelling. They settled over in the States many years ago, and dear Morticia now resides there with her husband.”
“Why does she write you?”
“She is arranging a sort of family reunion on All Hallow’s Eve. Apparently it has been far too long since we have all seen each other.”
“How long is that?”
“Several years at least. It was certainly before you and I met.”
“And will you oblige her?”
“I suppose I will.” He folded the letter and placed it neatly back in its envelope, tucking it into his inside pocket. “You’ve been angling for a holiday, my boy. Would this satisfy you?”
“Wouldn’t it be terribly rude?” I asked, startled. “She has invited you, not me.”
He tutted. “Nonsense, Watson! Morticia knows we live together, of course.”
“How?”
“She will have read your book.”
“Oh! Well that is kind of her. But a family reunion, Holmes, I am not—”
“You are my partner and intimate friend. I assure you there are members of the Addams clan with far more tenuous connections, and many of them also of no blood relation. You will not be out of place, and they will be glad to meet you.”
i made a post like this before but I can't find it now. so. I'll just redo it.
What's the first "big news story" you remember from when you were a kid?
It's something I love to ask mixed-aged groups sometimes because I think it's really interesting to see the responses. I've gotten answers from the Olympics of [whatever year] to Watergate to more recent stuff from my niblings.
My first news thing I remember is the OJ Simpson trial. I vaguely remember watching the news with my grandparents before that, but that's the first story I remember, in part because my second grade teacher had us go play so she could watch the verdict 😂
I remember walking down the street and seeing a sign protesting George W. Bush’s war on Iraq, so I think that.