Romana: Why are you crying? Leela: Because... you're dead, Romana. Romana: No! No, I'm not. Narvin: Yes. Yes, you are. Now, lie down...

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Romana: Why are you crying? Leela: Because... you're dead, Romana. Romana: No! No, I'm not. Narvin: Yes. Yes, you are. Now, lie down...

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Leela: Talk dirty to me. Narvin: I’m not good at it. Leela: Just do it. Narvin: Umm, I’ve been bad? Leela: Oh yeah? How bad? Narvin: I...kicked a goose. Leela: Yea—wait, what?
Leela: love when my body makes a sound I've never heard before. Like girl what organ was that. Who's in there.
Leela: You cry when someone even mentions the movie Titanic. Narvin, tearing up: Those two only had each other!
Arkadian: I hate Pottery Barn too! They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed. Torvald: You took off your pants and climbed under the sheets.

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Ollistra: Well, you know what they say: Can’t bake a pie without losing a dozen men!
Romana: What are you drinking? Leela: Vodka. Romana: Straight? Leela: No, lesbian.
Brax: I've started saying nonsense phrases at work like "that's neither cheese nor cheddar" just to see my coworkers nod like they understand
Leela: Tell me about your family. Narvin: I have one.
Brax: if you need anything, just ask Narvin: I- Brax: someone else.

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“I’ve made a lot of enemies in my time. I mean, a lot. But out of all the people in the world, i hate you guys the least.”
-Brax
Romana: Okay, Leela, I know you said you're okay, but I can tell you're not by the way you're gardening.
Brax: You know what my problem is? I'm too emotionally intelligent. I always know what people are thinking and feeling. It's impossible to have all that information and to not manipulate them. It's a curse.
Leela: People underestimate me because I'm human. What they don't understand is I am a strong woman. Leela: And that strength comes from my values, my courage, and my dogged pursuit of vengeance.
[on the phone] Romana: Leela, I'm breaking up- Leela: I'm pregnant. Romana: I meant the call. Leela: Right, sorry. I panicked.

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Leela: There’s a special section in hell reserved for you. Ollistra: That’s good. I’d hate to wait in line.
Romana: Narvin, we have to find Leela. Narvin: Oh sure, let me just load my “Tap into every security camera in the Capitol” app. Narvin: I’m sorry if that sounded like sarcasm. It wasn’t, I am in.