There's A Million Things I Haven't Done

tonight’s mood is the deep desire to be held close in a dimly lit room, covered in blankets while rain is softly falling outside

What the hell even is the this post

It’s the sins of humanity crying out to be known

The five boxing wizards jump quickly

Why zip along quick fam, just relax and vibe.

I consider myself to be a real 90s kid. a real 1890s kid. seduce me with your knowledge of oscar wilde

1790s kid here, let’s refuse to pay tax on whiskey and other alcohols.

I know we’re all used to the whole Scabbers is Pettigrew thing but can you imagine getting kidnapped by some dude and then your very professional teacher appears and points a gun at your dog and goes “Mr. Sprinkles is a war criminal”

today during lunch a kid and i were debating the gender of god and he said “god’s a man in the bible” and i said “i’m pretty sure god is technically nonbinary or genderfluid, but let me check that” and i unzipped my backpack and the boy said “what’s she doing?” and my friend replied “she’s getting her bible” and i’m not sure how he felt when i set it down on the lunch table and flipped open to genesis but i definitely felt amazing.

op ur url says it all

just saw someone ask whether batman or spiderman would win in a fight, as if batman would see a brightly-colored sassy acrobat and not immediately adopt him

now, in fairness, peter parker has a history of seeing someone else in a costume and immediately throwing hands only to realize three pages later that there was literally no reason to do that, but it’s not like misplaced aggression is disqualifying when it comes to suddenly acquiring a batdad

@batmanisagatewaydrug

Bruce, upon realizing that he’s getting punched repeatedly by a flippy and talkative spider-child with 0 brain cells and a strong moral compass, immediately begins filling out mental adoption papers 

Peter, catching the image of an adult dressed vaguely like an animal and standing in the shadows out of the corner of his eye, immediately backflips into a roundhouse kick while shouting “batter up!”

Batman, internally: Unfortunately I love it.