ProbsJosh

good morning God has let me live another day and I’m about to make it everybody’s problem

The Anti-Christ came and went, but no one noticed because he wasn’t worse than the current state of the world already is. The rapture followed, but no one went to Heaven, so we didn’t notice that either. We’ve been living in Hell for the last 5 years, and no one has noticed, yet.

oh I didn’t realize this was a writing prompt

throw back to this post in the horrible year 2026 🙁

if i had a time machine, first thing id do is obviously kill hitler. even if germanys fascism was caused by complex socioeconomic factors itd still be worth doing for the bit. then id go even further back to the early 20th century and become one of those old timey bank robbers, when they had names like 'pretty boy floyd' and 'baby face nelson' and id make sure people knew me as 'sweet baby ray' just to see how it fucks with barbeque sauce history

the number 1 rule of fanfic is have fun and be yourself. the number 2 rule is the average healthy adult male can lose roughly 2 liters of blood before dying.

tumblr is like an abandoned space station & you all are the thing in the vents

not me though. im girl with tanktop

in response to the crazy internet theories that i, spiderman, am secretly mayor zohran mamdani: ill never tell ;)

hes taller than you so no

by like an inch you asshole shut up

the “sexy lamp test” but for disabled folks: if you can replace your disabled character with a beloved pet dog that needs an expensive surgery to survive then you have to throw out your manuscript 

Everything used to be 20 dollars and now that I finally have 20 dollars everything is now 200 dollars

As a kid, I wasn’t allowed to touch the hot stove with my bare hands. But now I get to do it whenever I want

printers behave like that because the medieval monks they put out of work are haunting them

dude, this is really scary, and liminal as well. It's like the bathrooms