Took Ollie to the vet today. And I'm not gonna say who. But ONE of us had a panic attack immediately after the checkup and wouldn't get out of the sink

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Took Ollie to the vet today. And I'm not gonna say who. But ONE of us had a panic attack immediately after the checkup and wouldn't get out of the sink

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you are not immune to inventing an arbitrary set of rules that only you have to adhere to
@ralfmaximus Showers that will kill you
Holy shit I thought this was a Sims bit or someone playing with CAD software, but the last few seconds knocked me out
ADHD advice from non-ADHD people: start blocking out your day and put things in your google calendar
ADHD advice from ADHD people: any time you're waiting for your food to microwave YOU HAVE TO WASH DISHES WASH AS MANY AS YOU CAN THIS IS A RACE AGAINST TIME THIS IS THE ONLY TIME THIS COULD HAPPEN

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THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT
Personally I do think that sometimes non-hockey fans can end up mischaracterizing Shane and Ilya because they don't know enough about hockey/hockey playstyles
The Ilya we see in Heated rivalry would not be throwing the first punch, he's not an enforcer. Ilya is a star center and a Pest. He wouldn't be doing his job correctly if he was punching players every other game, it would end up with not enough ice time to let him be the playmaker he's paid to be.
But being a pest can be playmaking! Find a player to bait, emotionally push them just enough that they try to fight you, and then get the fuck out of there before the ref gives you both penalties. This gets your team the power play. There is probably someone on Ilya's line dedicated to helping him get out of the fights he starts, and finishing them for him!
I also think this is also something that Shane would respect. Ilya is good at it and it's a good strategy for his team. I don't think Shane would see it as some dirty tactic, because Shane probably thinks everyone with a brain can see it for what it is! He probably thinks everyone should be able to see that being an asshole is a tactic for Ilya, that it's something to ignore and not fall for, that it's a strategy and not personal beef.
I think Shane's more disappointed when a Metro falls for it. Shane sees it as Ilya set up a Looney Toons ass obvious trap and one of his teammates ran into it. Why be mad at Bugs Bunny when you can be mad at your defenceman for falling for a fucking Bugs Bunny trap.
yeah sure whatever
#how long have we been holding on to this one?
i’ve had this queued for 365 days
Either people need to learn how to tell the difference between an “I’m sorry” that takes direct responsibility and an “I’m sorry” that signifies sympathy, or I’m gonna start responding to unfortunate information with a solemn nod and a “Sympies,” because I am tired of receiving a “Why? It wasn’t your fault” every time I try to vocalize compassion.
I'm forwarding all of you my next therapy bill.
Can I propose the XKCD method instead?
XCKD 945, ID in Alt

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A mom helping her kids beat a hard level in Super Mario Land, 1990s.
[image description: screencap from Doctor Who of Martha Jones on her phone while glaring at The Doctor who is offscreen.
It is captioned with a tweet: Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but I stopped romanticizing you in my head and realized you kinda suck ass
/end id]
ARAGORN in The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
you learn something new everyday. unless you're a historian. then you learn something old

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i go to the shop and I ask if they have any raspberries. they say no, they used to sell raspberries, but they haven't had any in stock in the last 15 years. I ask if there's somewhere else I can go to buy raspberries. They say no, with confidence and pride, they're the only shop around who has ever sold or will ever sell raspberries. Other shops might sell other fruit, sure, but they have a monopoly on all raspberries forever. I ask if they're possibly planning on them selling them again in future? they say they can't tell me that.
on the way home, I encounter someone eating raspberries. I ask and they tell me that they grow their own, they got some seeds from the shop back in The Raspberry Days and kept them. They take me to a field of many beautiful raspberry plants and invite me to pick my own, they're free for all the town to pick whenever they'd like.
someone comes up behind us. It's the shop manager, President of Nintendo Shuntaro Furukawa. he hatefully throws a bob-omb that blows up and kills both of us instantly for stealing 200 trillion dollars worth of potential Raspberry Shop That Doesn't Do Raspberries Anymore profits that they weren't making and then he turns around to the camera with a big thumbs up and says don't do piracy or something ok please