Heteronym Blogs

Huh...

I love Irma.

Irma is constantly surprised by the newfangled sewing gadgets our store sells. Today she bought some extra-fine glass-head pins and a magnetic pincushion. As I’m ringing her purchases up, she tells me very seriously, “did you know, if you’re careful, you can sew RIGHT OVER those pins? You don’t need to take them out!”

I told her that I liked that you can’t accidentally melt the head of the glass pins with your iron, and she nodded. “They used to all be like that, but times changed.”

I love old sewing machines and asked what kind of machine she has, and she goes, “Oh, it’s an old Singer Featherweight that my husband bought me when we were first married. It’s probably not worth anything anymore, but the thing sews fine. Have you seen the ones those girls over there–” indicating the sewing machine sub-store in my location “–have? Those things go in every direction and the needle always comes to the top when you stop sewing! Imagine how handy that is!”

I mention that I used to sew on my grandmother’s Featherweight but now there’s a intra-family war about who owns Grandma’s Featherweight and so no one gets to use it. It’s genuinely the best portable straight-stitch machine I’ve ever used.

I warn her to never let anyone tell her that Featherweight isn’t worth something. “I know, I miss my husband and it’s always going to have a place in my heart, just like your grandma’s.”

“I mean, Irma, there’s that, but they’re also worth a really notable amount of money. The Singer Featherweight is really financially valuable. I almost never see them for sale around here for less than about $400, and that’s in bad condition.”

09.05.2021 - solarflared

“When dad said he didn’t want any cat in the house. Him 2 weeks later:”

[ID: A series of fake tweets set in the universe of The Batman (2022), from the perspective of Gotham’s citizens. They read as follows:

Cedric C. (@/cedricccc): Ever since the flood last year, I’ve seen a few weird fringe theories about who the Batman is, but the craziest shit I’ve ever heard are the folks who think Bruce Wayne is the Bat. My man looks one dropped ice cream away from a mental breakdown.

Penny E. Larson (@/penny4urthots): i went to high school with bruce wayne at gotham academy. we got partnered together to dissect a frog and he started crying when he saw it. i had to do all the cutting. This man is #notthebat and we also need to protect him at all costs

R. Wilson (@/gothamtoaustin): I used to work for Wayne Ent. before I moved to TX. One day Wayne had to give my department a presentation and he was so awkward it hurt to watch. He dropped all his index cards, mumbled the whole time, zero eye contact. There’s no way. #notthebat

Javier Perez (@/itsjaviiiii): Bruce Wayne came into the 7-11 I used to work at, got an icee, realized he forgot his wallet as i was checking him out, then put the icee down and speed-walked away before i could get a word in edgewise. i would have given it to him for free. anyway yeah #notthebat

Alice Li (@/aliceingotham): Bruce is a regular at my grandparents’ restaurant. He gets take out a few times a month. I can’t tell you how incredibly soft-spoken this man is. My grandma always tries to take care of him but he shrinks away. Can confirm he is definitely #notthebat

Noah Crocker (@/gothamisnumba1): This poor bastard. Leave him alone. I was at that library charity thing last month and I saw him honest-to-God hiding behind a curtain. I went over to ask if everything was ok but a GCPD guy got to him first and pulled him out of the room. Cut him some slack guys. #notthebat

Libby H. Lewis (@/gothamlibby): Gotham, come on now. We can at least protect our boy Bruce Wayne from this nonsense. Are we all forgetting that time when he “ran away” as a teen and was found crying in a port-a-potty at an AFI concert? It was in the news for months. Leave him alone. #notthebat /End ID]

Prompt submissions for this event is closed!!

We are delighted that so many people joined and submitted different ideas. Thank you all for your participation and enthusiasm!

With the end of Prompt Submissions, we bring you to the next stage: PROMPT VOTING!!

With over 200 suggested prompts, we have put together a vote: you can choose your favorites and help us decide on the final prompts for SladeJay Week 2022.

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Duke Thomas Rare Pairs Challenge is excited to announce the final prompts for DUKE THOMAS WEEKEND 2022, running from June 24th to 26th, 2022.

DAY ONE - June 24th, 2022

Mastering his meta powers

Different Superhero Family

Isekai (Duke ends up in another world)/ Duke across the Multiverse

Caught in the act

Protectiveness

Gay Panic

Proving Himself

DAY TWO - June 25th, 2022

Reverse Robins/Duke is the first kid Batman picked up

Accidental Child Acquisition

"Hold him down and take him slow"

Secret Relationship

Undercover Mission

Bruce adopts Duke

Time Travel

DAY THREE - June 26th, 2022

Outsider POV

Only bat without powers

"You're only crazy if it doesn't 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠, right?"

Family reveal

JLA mentor

Favorite Bat/Duke's favorite sibling

Body swap