...for science!

sorry I can’t hang out tonight. yeah I’m busy freaking out over things that might not even happen. yeah it’s gonna take a while

every time someone realizes they dont have to pick between being a boy or a girl an angel gets its wings btw. and also extremely loud cheering can be heard in the distance from me specifically

@this-is-nonbinary-joy

I think the hottest thing a woman can be is a weirdo

The crazy thing is, ninety-nine times out of a hundred, if you asked me on any given day "Would like to see a picture of some genitals?" my answer would be "😰 No, that's... No, thank you. I'm okay, actually." I have nothing but the utmost respect for people who do engage with the penis side of the internet, but personally, I've spent the better part of two decades doing all I can NOT to have pictures of dick and balls or sexy bikini babe buttcheeks blasted onto my retinas constantly. And yet... to be denied the penis? To have a jumped up pile of javascript tell me, a grown adult with an air fryer and an outstanding council tax bill, that I cannot be trusted to withstand the sight of a bare nipple unless I let it scan my drivers' license? I will move heaven and earth to see that fucking nipple, friend. I will walk a thousand miles barefoot on hot coals before I give you big brother bitches my passport number. A thousand miles through the desert with five VPNs just to press my face up against the glass and see the last uncensored picture of two My Little Pony Characters sixty-nining each other, and I don't even want! to look at it! But I will! I must! for the sake of our fucking democracy!

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

Insensitivity reader to make sure that your characters are ignorant assholes in the ways that make the most sense for the characterization you're trying to achieve

Just get the biggest douchebag in your writing group to tell you what he would have done.

ok no but we really need this service. I read a horror novel whose protagonist was a gay british aristocrat studying classics at oxford and going to Tibet in 1900. And the first roughly third of the book was assuring the audience he was from a woke christian denomination but didn't believe in god and thought that was silly and also his lower class manservant/ boyfriend/ childhood best friend was the top and so he never thought to try and order his BF around. So he's like, woke in a 21st century way. Not racist, not misogynistic, thinks that the classics are so droll for not being more about asia, isn't doing really unethical sex tourism in the east like a LOT of gay aristocrats did in the empire. 1900. it is 1900. He's woke in 1900. the book is about some freaky shit going down in Tibet in 1900 with a british aristo and he's woke. aaaahhhhh!!!!! It's like that post with Eric Cartman giving his fucking pronouns as he/they

#If you want to do a period piece ask yourself why#And remember the other things that that period will entail; your regency story is founded on slavery#It was a big industry and made a lot of money for all of the rich people of Europe in the 16th century onwards#Oh so it's race blind? So /these/ PoC are okay with others being chattel? Or if there's no slavery - where's the money coming from?#You don't get very rich people with massive houses without making a lot of other people poor (or worse)#It has no place in your romance? Fine#So why are the people hyper formal and manners so codified? If there's no such thing as class and historical serfdom?#And what is the natural reaction to growing up in that stratified society?#Is it arrogance that you deserve all of the privileges you enjoy? Is it anger when you don't get what you deserve#Gimme something I can believe in or gtfo

Dat's right boss. Now just tell us what ya need and we'll get it done boss.

who needs ta sleep with da fishes boss

sorry bawss, I was too busy searchin up da anime girls boss. real pretty.

Forget dem anime goils. Dere only temporary. But da boss is forever. Right boss?

Da boss got turned into a butterfly!!

Wadda bea-utiful transformation, boss. goes to show youse gotta preciate the lil things in life

ay boss congrats on da metamoiphosis

i have a Persian agenda where i encourage every man i know to grow the longest and prettiest hair possible

personal agenda. Personal.

i’m speechless. there’s a guy for everything.