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Girl whose most frequent mistake is inaction voice: wow I keep making mistakes I better not do anything

If you remember being a teenager you're a creep because you straight up saw yourself naked back then. The only way to be righteous is to obliterate your mind with drugs until you can't remember anything

as a child i assumed that martha’s vineyard was a fancy private vineyard owned by martha stewart and the reason rich people vacationed there was because they were friends with martha

oh boy! something in my mailbox from the IRA? I wonder what it could be!

level 271 penismancer demonstrating his arcane might

Hanging out with me and you keep getting annoyed cause you think I keep sighing loudly but it's actually wind rushing through my strangely hollow interior and I blow away

if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit

idk i would personally rather give up access to certain products seasonally or locally than have people enslaved to give me the ability to have any product any place any time. i think i can go without tomatoes in january.

i truly do think that most people if confronted with it and pressed on it would agree. but it's comfortable to gain privileges from someone else's suffering, especially if you don't have to see that suffering directly.

i'm off the penn don't teller