disgruntled skeleton

this is like if i said i'm a prophet because i know exactly when you'll die and then pulled out a gun and shot you with it

Enjoy a drink on one of my special coasters. Yea I custom made them (the coasters) to be so light the drinks condensation makes em stick to the bottom of your glass, but still heavy enough that when it (the coaster) finally clatters to the ground it's loud as fuck and shatters your nerves and makes you spill your drink everywhere. Why am I doing this? Well, it's a sex thing for me

"hmm, let me check my notes" [I open my Grimoire and very quickly flip past a page that is clearly a picture of a wizard leaving you in a hot car]

“why don’t you just…?” the answer is either money or anxiety

or the Bone Pharoh

'you have x many followers' those r cadavers girl. corpses. abandoned vessels of blogs who once were. its the apocalypse in there. its me and my 5 mutuals against the world.

telling the kids that theres an among us movie and they get excited and you sit them down and put on The Thing

very funny that i still think of tumblr as being relaxing because sometimes I’ll come on this site and my eyes will immediately be assaulted by a string of words that even monkeys with typewriters would be sent to hell for and I’ll just have to deal with that

that’s between me and my delusions

got cornflakes for fried chicken & the back of the box has its own recipe. easy as pie. "rinse chicken tenders with cold water and coat with crushed kelloggs corn flakes cereal." and then cook. no binding agent. no seasoning. nothing but a pile of flavorless chicken with a side of the extra-dried-out cornflakes that fell off it. serve warm with your favorite dipping sauce. doesnt even say serve hot. Serve Warm. wouldnt wanna get too wild with it. truly this is the spirit of cornflakes