Always Be Yourself

But ALSO! The best thing about writing injuries is that there is so much variation.

I spent a few years as an EMT, and I saw people walk away from vehicle rollovers with nary a scratch... and also, I saw people break their knees because they sat down. I've seen a guy get lifelong impairments out of falling off something twelve feet high, but I know someone who survived being stabbed over a dozen times with no lasting (physical) injuries. There's range.

In nearly any given situation*, a realistic level of injury is anywhere from "Dies within five minutes" to "Dies 73 years later surrounded by grandchildren and great-grandchildren, having zero long-lasting repercussions from that incident."

*Not every situation, mind you; papercuts are generally exempt

If you don't mind a ramble (because I haven't done a fun character injury ramble in a while so I shall use this as an excuse)...

The key to writing realistic injuries is to start with what you want to happen. It's your character and your scenario, so start with what you want to happen for Plot Reasons.

Example:

You know your character gets in a car crash with a wall, and you want them laid up for a week, but able to move around with minimal pain soon after. Cool. Now that you have your desired outcome, you can run through the scenario. You won't want your character ejected or to have a major head impact with the windshield, so they were wearing their seatbelt. You want them to still be able to walk, so the dashboard probably didn't crumple in on them. That means they were either in a car with good safety ratings, or they weren't going super fast, or a combination thereof. But you do want them a little bit injured, enough so they don't want to go on that hiking trip for another week, so make sure they were going fast enough to get some good ol' whiplash.

Another example:

You want your character to make a dramatic exit out the window, and you want them to be limping a little for dramatic effect as they head off into the forest surrounding the castle. Nice, we love a good dramatic window exit. But you want to make sure the character won't be out of commission for the battle in a fortnight's time. This could totally be a first-floor window, or even a second-floor one. But what if it really needs to be the fourth floor, for pre-existing scenario reasons? Well, maybe there's a balcony halfway down. Or maybe there's a nice slanted roof underneath that broke their fall. Or maybe the castle is built into a cliff so the windows on that side of the castle are only ten feet up. Or maybe they clung onto ivy outside, which ripped out of the wall a bit but was enough to slow them down. There's all sorts of ways you can play this off!

Rather than trying to make a scenario and then fitting the injury into it, come up with the injury (or at least, level of injury) and plan out the details of your scenario around it.

The only caution is to make sure to build scenarios realistically—like, I could totally see a character being able to keep going after being stabbed because it was a shallow wound. But if they get a shallow stab wound... and they only get ✨grazed✨ by a bullet... and they happen to survive a terrible car accident because they were in the best possible seat... AND they were pushed out of an airplane but their BFF managed to skydive right out after them and caught them... that's getting to be a little much. XD Any of those is realistic except maybe the last; IDK, I know injuries, not skydiving, but too many near-misses in a single story starts to feel like plot armor.

As I was going through Charles Benson’s 1864 journal I came across a recipe for gingerbread that he had written down. It’s rare to come across a historical recipe written by a Black person that hasn’t been rewritten for white audiences. This is definitely a working man’s recipe for other working men. Compare it to any other gingerbread recipe you might be familiar with, or here’s a comparable 1868 recipe from “Mrs. Winslow”.

I halved the recipe but otherwise made it as Mr. Benson had written it. Molasses was the main sweetener for most working-class households in New England, and is the only sweetener in this cake. The lard is the only fat, and the leavening agents here are the sour milk (buttermilk) and (baking) soda. I baked it in a pie pan for about 40 minutes at 350 degrees Fahrenheit. It made for a very tender, lightly sweet and lightly spiced cake with a crispy top— very delicious!

[Transcription:

Ginger Bread

4 cups flour

2 “” molasses

1 “” sour milk

1 tablespoonfull of ginger

1/2 cup of Lard

Like that shit is RIGHT UP HIS ALLEY. You got any idea the kind of muscles you get from that shit? The body control and the grip strength you get from doing that on a regular basis? Sure he's Spider-Man and can just stick to the rocks and he's already got super strength but just for a moment imagine with me Peter finding a tiny space in the rock climbing community that's just like:

"Hey kid your form's looking a little off, if you do it this way you wont strain your arms as much and it'll be easier to hold for longer."

"Gee thanks, I appreciate that!"

"Anytime bud!"

And then later finding out that the habits he's picked up means he's less tired while climbing around on patrol?? Or maybe it'd even be a good excuse for how he can climb up to random places that a normal human can't!

"Hey how'd you get up there?"

"Oh I rock climb."

"Understandable. Have a nice day!"

And just imagine Peter being an absolute LEGEND in the gym he goes to. Some random kid that shows up every other week, free climbs three of the hardest routes in a single go, calls it a day, and leaves.

Like DUDE

And okay let's not even include the idea that he'd practice techniques, but dont you think it'd be a nice getaway for him? A place where he can just climb over and over and maybe just maybe he finds a calm meditation while doing it? He can scurry around on the walls in a space that's acceptable for him to do so and it wouldn't be weird for him? And maybe just maybe if the employees there notice how freakishly fast he climbs the routes, what if they just mind their own business and leave him to it.

Like:

Do yall see my vision here??

Yall see what i mean??

this is a place where he can scurry and be spidery and climb shit without anyone batting an eye

Equal opportunity benefits can be far-reaching

There was an older gentleman sitting across from me on the M train.  It was about 6:30am, so I didn’t think much of it when he started leaning over.  It was when he kept going when most people would jerk awake that about 5 of us took action.  We asked if anyone knew CPR in our car, and when we pulled into the next station, we held the doors open and shouted for a doctor (there was a firefighter on the train with us who knew CPR, because that’s how things are in NYC).  No response during CPR.  The older gentleman’s lips were turning blue. 

When the ambulance arrived, the paramedics took over and after 2 minutes of no reaction, I watched something that will always haunt my soul existentially, the way this pic does:  The paramedic yelled at this man that he had to get up because he’d be late for work.  And he got a response.  I don’t know if the older man made it, but he had a pulse when they took him up the stairs to the ambulance.