we ship polyvees here sir

can I make a somewhat gauche angel dust poll

I think Valentino was the only vee raised religious and not only that was actually sincerely fervently devout for a period of time and so now is the only Vee who resents heaven for never answering his prayers

it's just the way the vees are all in their own way convinced that their worth is dependent upon their ability to shape themselves into a superficially pleasing product that can be sold to others for the low low cost of their undying love and admiration. and yet they've each found two people who know them first for the ugliest, most vile traits they possess, all the reprehensible truths they work so hard to keep hidden behind camera-ready facades, and—in defiance of everything they've ever understood about the basic nature of the world—still want them absolutely and unconditionally. the sheer potency of being cared for by the kinds of people who don't care about anybody, without ever having to do a single thing to earn it... and I couldn't possibly imagine three people who deserve it less or need it more

Now obviously the hard part of launching a land invasion of Heaven will figuring out where they hid the hole. Finding the miniscule aperture, the hole in physical reality to which all souls are translocated at the moment of death, and then jamming something sturdy in there, getting it in reallll good and working it around until it's big enough to fit some guys with guns through. But the nice part is that the nature of Heaven means that, one, not many people get in in the first place, and two, none of them are good at fighting, because people who're good at fighting mostly don't go to heaven. Except us, when we find the hole. The point is that once we're in there's not much they're gonna be able to do. Pretty much we'll have free run of the place

Update! So we forgot about God

Turning the cuck chair around backwards to show I'm not like your other, boring cuckolds

*youth pastor voice* you know who else got nailed while all his friends watched? that's right,

there's a lot of stigma associated with it but personally being a wacky cartoon villain never prevented me from finding love and fulfillment in my life

You've heard of multi-shipper now get ready for multi-headcanoner: where multiple interpretations of the same character coexist in your head and they are all great.

I've been haunted by the vision that Brighter should have been about Vox rising into power IN HELL, going from a confused sinner to the very top, without selling his soul, just manipulation, determination– and we could have seen just a glimpse of how he met Velvette and/or Valentino, just a quick nudge

Very important to me that reality in hell is a little bit fluid, a little wack. Valentino’s wings fold around him, as long or short as he needs them to be, defying topology, rolling into sleeves and then unfurling in an instant. Don’t try to follow the lines and planes because the geometry gets non-Euclidean. Sometimes Alastor is wearing shoes and sometimes he has hooves jutting through the good leather—but the soles go back to normal eventually so he doesn’t complain. He’s ripped Vox open several times before and it’s always a tossup if he’ll find a flesh heart or a circuit board in his chest—he has to think had about the taste of iron so the fluid spilling out from between his wires tastes like blood and not WD-40. When Nifty runs it seems like she has six skittering legs. Zeezi is always just too big for whatever room she’s in, regardless of its size. Velvette’s plastic fingers bend seamlessly like real flesh while her wrists joints seize if grit gets in them. Pentagram city is too small for its inhabitants. There are entire neighborhoods you might never know about because you have to know about them to get there. The streets bend and twitch and groan. When someone sings the lights change and the scenery shifts. Injuries hurt more if you expect them to, confidence can buy invulnerability. There is no fixed truth; Hell isn’t a place, its the collective dreaming of the dead and the damned and the demonic, a whirling surrealist strangeness only given some measure of solidity by a hefty dose of angelic power and the sheer number of thinking creatures who dwell within it.

Obviously it's completely valid to project onto fictional stories and characters, and ignoring canon to reinterpret things in ways that are more interesting to you is very fun and I do this all time time myself. It's fine and good and makes fandom more interesting to bring your own rewrites and ideas to the table.

enter my pervert mist

all cities become walkable cities due to the low visibility for vehicles in the radius of my pervert mist

the divorce rate will skyrocket due to married couples being unable to find each other in my pervert mist