Staying Lost

reblog to boop prev with your paw

not the AI summary bot in our stand ups degendering me LMAO

yeah your name is chloe and all your work stuff is set to she/her but we've statistically determined your voice is too clocky so youre they/them now

eat an entire can of sweetened condensed milk. you deserve it.

(sigh) okay... (CRUUEEENNNCH....) (SCREEEEEENCH...) owie.. (CRUUEEENCH)

this is one of the most rewarding things about posting self care tips on this site. witnessing people's lives getting better in real time. this is why I post

my job in the anarchist commune will be having the monopoly on the legitimate use of violence

parents love giving you job hunting advice that's like Have you tried destroying and betraying yourself for nothing

the beautiful mountains and waterfalls and animals and trees are all a distraction. they're a test. god wants you to network and build your business portfolio

"Just because I'm right, doesn't mean I'm being helpful" is a vastly underrated thought process that I strongly encourage others to get comfortable with

Creepypasta retrospective does stay winning. Trans women remain supreme.

you could follow the genuinely funny poster who is going to be gone in 6 months, or you could follow me, the mediocre-to-okayish poster who's been on tumblr for 11.5 years and will be here until the flames finally reach and destroy the data center with our precious memories

I just don't think we ever wrapped up the Clown Sightings of 2016 in a satisfactory way.

You listen to music regularly? Why? Have you even tried quitting? Could you quit? You get music stuck in your head? Wow. You're so ruined and music brained. I bet you make your partners listen to music with you when you have sex. Music addiction has really ruined a whole generation. You know it's not realistic to expect reverb in real life, right? You're probably so desensitized that you don't even feel anything anymore when you hear a bird singing that it wants some fuck.

being called an old soul when you were kid and knowing you just got diagnosed as a weird cunt

Graced by Geckolepis typica from Madagascar. I love that they’re quite round creatures and then they have these dainty little toes. Also, their scales are full bone and both scale and skin come off when they get grabbed, which is…unpleasant. Consequently, catching these geckos for research without damaging them requires special techniques. 19th century researchers used bundles of cotton wool, but I imagine this wasn’t very effective, because cotton still has a lot of friction and the friction would pull the skin and scales off. In my (quite extensive) experience, the best technique is to carefully and quickly flick the geckos from their tree trunk or branch into an open dry plastic bag using a finger or stick.

Typecast if it's the casting directors fault, one-note if it's the actors fault

if I just had the presence of mind and the wherewithal and the chutzpah and the bandwidth and the executive function and the energy and the mental resources and the spoons and the right attitude and the capacity and the gumption and th