An Unsavory Fellow @fightmekentparson - Tumblr Blog

I drew my little guys so I can print them and put them above my doorframe. Now I just need money to print them out 💔 #staplessponsorme

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i hope when we get the tv series Ollie and Wicks are in the background doing couple shit. like yaoi hidden mickeys. they're holding hands on a tour of Faber. they're in a dark corner making out at a kegster. shit like that.

#omgcheckplease #check please

zimms

ollie and wicks my beloveds

sparrowsfallingfromthesky

#christopher 'chris' 'chowder' chow

omgpoindexter

thinking today about how we’ve invented 1000001 things about the frogs and soon we’re going to get ACTUAL CANON INFORMATION that is COLD HARD FACT

omgpoindexter

like we thought that all the information we had on them was all we were ever going to know. it’s like a miracle

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omgpostsplease

jack: the tv show copied us!

Pt. (1) (2) (2.5) (3) (3.5)

dykeseinfeld

a holster who is lactose intolerant but still drinks full gallons of milk because he's no pussy. a haus bathroom that shatters the plumbing system. a holster who somehow successfully blames this on the lax house.

ivecarvedawoodenheart

Chad W: I saw Goody Birkholtz at the devil’s toilet!

Shitty & Lardo: girl what were YOU doing at the devil’s toilet? 🤨

dykeseinfeld

[LOUDEST AND SMELLIEST NOISE YOU'VE EVER HEARD SHAKING THE FOUNDATIONS OF THE HAUS AS THE SEWAGE LINE BURSTS]

holster hiding 20 empty milk jugs and unopened lactaid packs behind him: i can't believe the lax team would do this to us.

thepaisleyelf

There’s a liquor store near my house that seems to be run exclusively by frat boys. They lovingly curate these bags, which I browsed today while “Oops I Did It Again” played through the store speakers. This is art to me, there is beauty everywhere for those with eyes to see it

#haus 2.0 all quit their jobs to open a liquor store

halfabreath

I think we as a fandom need to grow up and acknowledge that Ransom and Holster very likely have a finance podcast by now. I’m sorry but we can’t keep ignoring it like this even though it hurts

zim-tits

Omgcp Anniversary Week - one of my favorite moments from the Twitter 😂

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junji-info

The full illustration of the Mona Lisa parody by Ito, posted by the Junji Ito Hong Kong club.

#awwwwww me and my baby 🩷🩷🩷🩷 she used to suck on my fingers when she was little 😭

omgcpausandstuff

My headcanon for what Kind Of Guy Holster is in 2026 is that he regularly attends improv comedy workshops.

#oh yeah he definitely doesn't shut up about like. Middleditch and Schwartz

jedusaur

When you’re in the middle of playing hockey, you don’t have much time or lungpower to spare for lengthy chats, so hockey players develop a lot of on-ice shorthand. Some of this is probably limited to beer leagues like mine, but I’ve definitely heard a few of these phrases caught on the rink-level mics during NHL games, so I thought maybe some of y’all who don’t play hockey might be interested in translations of a few of the things hockey players yell at each other mid-game.

OFF = You are offside.

OOOOOOOFF = You are offside and don’t seem to realize it; stop trying to touch the puck and move your ass out of the fucking zone before you force a whistle.

CHANGE = You’ve been on the ice a long time.

CHAAAAAAANGE = Are you aware that there are other people on this team who would like to play hockey at some point?

ONE ON = An opposing player is trying to get the puck away from you and it appears that you haven’t noticed.

GOT TIME = Don’t panic and fling the puck into Siberia, there’s no one close enough to take it away from you right this second.

ICE IT = We’ve been in our zone for three minutes and everyone on the ice is nearing collapse, so go ahead, panic and fling the puck into Siberia.

I’M OPEN = Pass toward the sound of my voice right fucking now.

ALL YOU = Take the puck forward yourself; everyone else is far enough behind you that you should not rely on getting any backup on this developing play.

I GOT YOU = You are so egregiously out of position that it makes more sense for us to just switch jobs for a minute.

I GOT IT = If we both skate hard to the puck at the same time, as is currently happening, there will be no one to pass it to and also we are liable to collide in an unproductive fashion, so just let me handle it.

I GOT IT I GOT IT I GOT IT = You did not listen to me and we are about to collide in an unproductive fashion.

edited to add: NOOOOOOOOOOO = The ref has signaled no icing on this play, so quit gliding while you wait for a whistle and move your damn feet. (This is probably the most confusing one to overhear if you don’t know what it means XD)

jedusaur

back in the day this post made the rounds in hockey RPF and in Check Please and I am pleased to see once again a hockey-based fandom full of people who know nothing about hockey circulating this crucial info XD for the record I am always happy to splain hockey at pretty much anyone who asks!

jedusaur

oh that just means they’re a goalie. there is no explaining goalies. one time I asked my goalie why he didn’t use a gear bag with wheels (goalie bags almost always have wheels bc they have more/heavier equipment) and he—bent almost double under the weight of his gigantic bag—looked me straight in the eye and said “it makes me appreciate the game more.” I once knew a goalie who communicated solely via gifs of porn bloopers. there’s one NHL goalie whose pregame ritual is to go sit in the empty arena and stare at the empty ice surface for literal hours. each goalie is a full subculture that no one understands but themselves

omgpoindexter

me when i’m william poindexter

omgpoindexter

oh -

meteortrails

most key thing to remember re: nurseydex is that that is NOT their best friend. bc for both of them their best friend is and always will be Chris ‘Chowder’ Chow, for whom they will not stop fighting but would commit truly any amount of murder. chowder is always and forever the unspoken third person in that relationship. that’s their goalie dude like that’s their favorite fucking guy!!!!

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omgpoindexter