everything is sufficiently bright

you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for an amazing reason

johnny cash's little brother jimmy pennies is 3 inches tall and has a voice only dogs can hear

Marylanders don’t say hi hello how are you my name is they just try to kill you with their car. which is of course a great honor in their culture

stop thinking with your dick and start thinking with your pussy. ok now stop thinking with your pussy and start thinking with your dick again. meditate on the differences between them. call me back when you get it.

if you set off a rube goldberg type death trap to kill someone, if it's a long enough machine, it ceases to become your fault if somebody dies at the end. that's how I've gotten away with it all these years, and why I'm still going to heaven.

3-5 turkey vultures will soon be dispatched to your location.