itchy fingers

Highlights include:

For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.

Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.

Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.

I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.

I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.

Hi! We're Shousetsu Bang*Bang, the world's longest-running (that we know of) webzine of original smutty queer fiction and art! For the last twenty years, we've been putting out regular issues full of all kinds of queer romance focusing on sexy scenes and happy endings. Every issue is completely free, whether you're reading it on our website or downloading the ebook versions from Smashwords and Itch.io.

This is an all-volunteer endeavor, so we need your help! Want to do your part to help keep this one-of-a-kind (again, as far as we know) project going? Here's how!

Submit something!

If you're a writer and/or artist who likes creating original steamy queer love stories, we'd love to have your work in our pages. Check out our 2025 Editorial Calendar to see what's coming up, and look at our list of Current and Previous Signups to find out how to participate! (Hint: Turn something in by the deadline! It's so easy!)

Read what we've got already!

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Remember how I said this was an all-volunteer project? It's true! Our contributors give freely of their time and talents. And the main way to encourage writers and artists whose work you like to write and/or draw more for you is to tell them that you appreciate what they've done already! All our issue contents have comment forms at the bottom so you can let the creators know how much their hard work has meant to you.

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suicide baiting (often machine translated into other languages)

asking you to mail them your work with a promise of payment

As always, please be cautious if something in the comments seems untrue or strange, and follow internet safety best practices.

So, in terrible news, Trump's trying to pull some strings to pass this massive internet censorship bill, featuring all the kinds of internet censorship we're terrified of, including mandatory ID for accessing basically any website, specifically to crush state regulation of AI, because apparently this man will always see the moral bottom of the barrel and start digging.

6/14/2026

I got the Verification Required scam for the first time today. THIS ISN'T FROM TUMBLR. Report and block it if you get it.

live reaction of Vizzy T finding out that his former wife married someone that is more handsome than him and treats her like a goddess instead of an incubator (as drawn by the talented @feignedsobriquet )

Have you seen one of these dipshits? If you post regularly on ao3, chances are YES, but more likely you didn't notice nor suspect it was a bot. Sometimes they start off nice, or even praise you before getting nasty out of nowhere, like so:

But much like Grok, their newest obsession is nazism.

I don't know where they come from, or what purpose this could possibly serve other than suicidebaiting random people in the internet, I guess; but apparently they've started parroting names from real users to send these comments and shifting their general length to go by undetected. Maybe those are scrappers trying to train 'reviewbots' to be sold as part of some scam service promising to give feedback for newbie writers, who the fuck knows.

Here are more examples of the tone and backhanded compliments you can find in these: