When I say women should have higher standards for how they're treated, this is exactly what I mean. At the first insult? Kick. Him. To. The. Curb.

i think the world would be a happier place if we were all permanently stoned

the lottery by shirley jackson

hold on i have to read something real quick

dude

I'm gonna be honest for a second. I cant believe people still care about Taylor swift.

Post of the Year award

hey bestie i think ur post might be charmed 'cause you aren't gonna fuckin believe what happened today

The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.

how dare you say we piss on the poor

World Heritage Post

proud victim of the tumblr accent. it's fading out of public consciousness as the tik tok accent takes precedence; a linguistic evolution that makes the tumblr accent 85% funnier to unsuspecting civilians. it's like releasing a disease on a non-inoculated population. coughing baby versus hydrogen bomb.

im angry at myself for walking into that so perfectly

Can you swap their heads ?

can we'a skip the impeachment and just shoot him in the head

AND NOT MISS

im a big fan of how this person tried to get mario killed immediately after tadc thirstposting. fascinating behaviors going on on this website

I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever

The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late

For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral

hey just so you know, op of that post you reblogged let the dogs out :/

who?

who?

who?

who?