Fuck If I Know Bro

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

thy mother

Art thou for fucking real

the utter ecstasy of “is that lavENDER?” is what sells it for me

a level of appreciation for charcuterie the likes of which has never been seen before

free use? *smirks snartly* so naive. you know nothing in this damned society is really free...

You can make a movie with where the only white character is a man named Ray Cism whose one line of his 16 seconds of screen time is “I seriously hate women and minorities.” and you’ll find fifty bajillion reader x Ray Cism fanfics and renaissance style drawings of him with a halo of golden light

"i ate too many cookies" is truly an ageless problem. an unlearnable lesson.

Do you remember the episode of Spongebob where he's training gary for the snail race and does a coach persona + calls gary a girl and has an aside where he's like "I called you a lady to demean you 🤓" and right after he says that it cuts to sandy and she somehow telepathically feels that Spongebob just did something misogynistic and us like I feel like I need to kick Spongebobs ass for some reason. And then she appears just at the end of the episode to kick his ass.

people foolishly dismiss desserts and treats as having no nutritional value when they actually are necessary for refilling your sanity stat. to prove my point please observe the emotional stability of the next person you meet who doesnt let themselves ever eat any form of dessert